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Possible past life relationship- what do you think?

meeramew

MeeraMew
Hello everyone. Thank you for making this wonderful community possible. I've been a lurker who finally found the courage to reach out for some guidance. Hope you guys can help me figure this one out :)

I believe I encountered a very strong past-life relationship in this life, but with my mind and heart being fairly new to the beliefs of reincarnation and karmic energy, I was hoping you could help lend some more practiced opinions. I'm asking mostly out of curiosity and hoping for guidance based on your own experiences.

I'm 26 years old and have been in a positive and supportive relationship with my boyfriend for over three years. I'm confident that we are on the right path together. However the past-life relationship isn't ours.

Here's the story. When I was in my first year of college, I remember seeing a guy in a friend's dorm building from across the hall talking with some mutual friends. My heart nearly stopped beating when I saw him and I immediately felt insecure. He wasn't beautiful by most standards but he stood there like a god to me. I had never seen him before in my life. We never talked and I didn't see him (or think much about him) until 3 years later, when by chance he was sitting in my living room at my downtown university house, invited again by mutual friends. I was again immediately drawn to his presence, I needed him. We talked through the group and when everyone left, we both stayed behind to finish the conversation we casually got into. We were up until dawn talking and couldn't take our eyes off each other (probably on the verge of creepy from an onlooker status). Long story short, the beginning of my most volatile and destructive relationship happened that night.

We spent the next 6 months in a whirlwind of arguments, passion, longing, obsession, games, and threats. On my end of it, I felt like I went from a confident, optimistic, rational, driven girl to an insecure and depressed mess. He analyzed and picked at my insecurities like a professional and made me believe terrible things about myself until I fell into a very deep depression. I didn't get out of bed for months. During my depression though I made the steps towards cutting him out of my life, and through a lot of meditation, positive health practices and support, I found happiness again. For such a quick moment in my life, it changed everything.

I've never been the same since this episode in my life. For a while I thought I'd lost all that was fun and magnetic about me but I've realized that he inadvertently taught me a lot about self-awareness and the impact one person or moment can have on another. I find myself to be much more conscientious and emotionally aware. However I do struggle with constant anxiety and small bouts of depression, which I never felt before he came into my life.

Why I think we knew each other in a past-life is because of the many relationships I've been in, the emotional charge, feelings of knowing one another, unhealthy obsession, and insecurities associated with this relationship have never been features of my otherwise healthy relAtionships, which I have to assume means those things aren't necessarily a feature of me.

What's interesting too is that feeling of knowing his eyes. He was an identical twin and his brother could walk by a million times and I wouldn't take a second glance. But I still find myself wanting to look into his eyes again while getting an accompanied feeling of anxiety.

I guess what I'm looking for is just some assurance that this was probably a soul I knew once before and that I'm not alone in experiencing such intense and irrational feelings for someone so volatile. And for still wondering about it years later when I'm in a happy relationship. I have no desire to ever go back but I still see him in my dreams constantly. What are your thoughts? Thank you for any advice or positive words. :)
 
I think it's obvious that the two of you had a powerful past life connection. Most of the people you know now you have known before. Both friends and enemies. I have had run-ins with several past life enemies in the current life. It was pure hell. At the time I didn't know it was past life related. But three years ago it started happening again, this time online by a "cyber-bully". I mentally asked myself "Why am I being attacked?" Instantly the name "J..." popped into my head. "J..." is an online friend I met a few years ago. I then realized it must be past life related. As soon as I realized the past life source, the threat evaporated into thin air. That's never happened to me before. Very strange. Very weird.


BTW, welcome to the group. :)
 
Hello Meeramew, welcome to the forum, I'm glad you posted this. It certainly sounds like an encounter with a very special soul. I'm wondering if you've read the book Twin Souls: Finding Your True Spiritual Partner by Maurie Pressman MD and Patricia Joudry? I think you would find it VERY interesting and relevant. The authors talk about the challenging relationships that could indicate a very special and soulful bond... and yes they are very caustic and troublesome. I'd love to hear your thoughts after you read the book.


I always like to tell people that we are all on a journey. We encounter people, places and things that influence our soul's mission of knowledge. They are most often very painful... the first tenant of Buddhism says that "life is inherently painful." So I would encourage you with the words: don't think of your relationship as bad, instead see it as beautiful agony. See this person as the other side of your soul (figuratively or actually... whatever your belief system allows). Accept the lessons and sorrow with wisdom. And above all move forward in your journey, as I did, by persistence in your study of reincarnation and spirituality.


Lastly, there are many good threads on twin souls and soul mates, enter those words into the search engine above... skim through them, there are many people like you and I who have dealt with and encountered our twin soul.


Many blessing to you! Please ask if you have any questions.


Tinkerman
 
That is a classic example of past life connection if I've ever read one.


As you can see, these relationships aren't always healthy (my first two PL-type relationships weren't either) but it sounds like you are well on your way to developing the benefits that come from walking through emotional and relational fire. The awareness is what creates the depression, in a way, because you can see more of the contrast between what is and what can be. The best part is that now you can see well enough to choose what is good and better ... and you can search for and find the best because you see the contrast more clearly now.
 
Indeed, it appears you've got one of your old past-life nemesis' reappearing in this lifetime. I guess we've all had them. Many continue to be destructive. So, even though you've physically gotten rid of him, it appears he's still messing with your mind. (He sounds like my deceased ex-husband.)


The reason I ask is that many times, the past life connections are of course, dangerous or at least, unhealthy. And the one who does the damage - in this case him - generally won't let it go and keeps coming back.


If souls do indeed agree to incarnate again together, with the intention that they will work through the problems, and then one doesn't hold up his/her end of the bargain/contract and goes back to old, abusive behavior, then it is clear that soul has no intention of doing the right thing, and as a matter of protection, you should consider breaking that 'karmic contract' and getting him out of your life (lives) for good.


Sometimes just physically getting him out of your world isn't enough. He can leave, as it appears he did in your case) imprints or 'strings' attached that continue to harm you. My ex husband after his death, began haunting my dreams. I'd divorced him 7 years prior and kept physical distance between us. But after his death? He found a back door and wasn't going to give it up until with the help of an intuitive healer, I broke the contract.


They don't have to be dead, though, for their soul to taunt you and mess with you. My husband had left Kansas and was physically separated from his abusive father, yet his father's energy kept trying to draw him in. My husband worked with the same intuitive healer and found that there were many lifetimes with his now-father, where he had been constantly abused - as a wife, as a child, as an employee and more. When it became obvious that his father wasn't going to let it go, my husband chose to break the karmic contract and has had peace in his life ever since. And when is father died, there was no re-emergence of that torment. It was a done deal.


I'd suggest that you try to find a good regression therapist to help you get rid of this dude and his history of abuse. If you want to PM me, I'm happy to give you the name(s) of two that we know personally. Energy work such as this can be easily done over the phone and doesn't require a physical presence with the therapist.
 
@argonne1918 Thanks for the welcome! It's interesting to think about all the relationships in your life and suddenly connecting all those unexplained feelings and occurrences to the possibility of our souls once knowing each other. Like you, I feel like attributing this obsession to an abusive past-life helps me let go more than I've already made myself do.


@Tinkerman Thank you for the welcome as well! I haven't read that book... but if you recommend it, I am curious about the subject and want to self-teach, so I think I'll definitely pick it up. And beautiful agony is the best way to describe the feeling. It's almost like a drug - I want that high again but my more experienced heart and brain make me much more cautious.


@Mere Dreamer - Absolutely... thank you for your response. :)


@Susan - Thank you for your input. I would like to see a regression therapist eventually, especially since recently his energy is finding its way back into my life after a very very long period of very little thought. My boyfriend and I are dealing with a lot of stressful situations at once right now so I think it's made me vulnerable to that energy. I would love those references. =]
 
Mere Dreamer said:
?... The awareness is what creates the depression, in a way, because you can see more of the contrast between what is and what can be. The best part is that now you can see well enough to choose what is good and better ... and you can search for and find the best because you see the contrast more clearly now.
Can you explain this awareness further. I had a pretty dark period shortly after meeting my sm. I seem to be climbing out now but understanding what caused it may be helpful.
 
meeramew said:
I guess what I'm looking for is just some assurance that this was probably a soul I knew once before and that I'm not alone in experiencing such intense and irrational feelings for someone so volatile. And for still wondering about it years later when I'm in a happy relationship. I have no desire to ever go back but I still see him in my dreams constantly. What are your thoughts? Thank you for any advice or positive words. :)
Hi meeramew


Welcome to the forum. It certainly sounds like a past life attraction thing to me. It's not unlikely he wasn't good news back then either.


Have you thought of doing some regression work to maybe find out what happened in the past? It might help lay some ghosts to rest.


You say it's all recently started up again. Do you have any idea why? Is there something going on in your present life that might have sparked it off again? Can you work out when it started up again and what was going on at the time? This can be a clue as to what happened in the past. You don't have to tell us all about it unless you want to, but have a think and see if you can work out the connection.
 
People come into our lives for various reasons. It is to teach us something or for us to teach them.


Perhaps this relationship was to test your strength and your main purpose was to learn to leave him. I've had 2 of those relationships where the only purpose I had with those men was to find the strength within to leave.
 
@tanguerra - Thank you for the welcome. I've been under a lot of stress recently with my current boyfriend. We're making a huge move for my job 12 hours away and he just lost his and is looking into a new career. There are a lot of big decisions to be made. It's very strange though... After not seeing or thinking much about him in 3-4 years, he's suddenly making this energy return. And I'm sure the stress has a lot to do with it but there's another force at work - I live outside of a major (major) city, he lives in the city. I have a friend who lives 30 or so blocks away. I haven't heard a thing about him in all this time from anyone, and the day this mental obsession starts I get a text from this friend of mine who ran into him in a very random way. They didn't talk any more than greetings. A few days later (today) this same friend meets with a mutual friend of ours who neither of us have seen in 3-4 years either. She is still in contact with him and told my friend without prompting that he treats women horribly and has been in a number of erratic relationships.


It was almost like she ran into him when he ran into my head, then a few days later the universe gave me this reminder why I let go and need to remain detached when she got that information. It's all been very strange...


I would really like to get some regression therapy done. What should I expect from a session? What do you think about these coincidences,
 
TheGlow said:
Can you explain this awareness further. I had a pretty dark period shortly after meeting my sm. I seem to be climbing out now but understanding what caused it may be helpful.
I recommend taking a look at the stages of the positive disintegration theory, which do a good job of summarizing what I feel happened to me during my recovery from depression.


Basically, the sensitivity that comes from having been hurt makes us more aware of the less beneficial qualities ingrained in everyday culture and social behavior.


Depression is one of the signs of seeing and feeling the suffering and disconnection between people, especially when the problems aren't identified as part of the culture/relationship and are seen instead as symptoms of a personal failure to conform or live up to some ideal.


The theory goes on to suggest that this disintegration actually leads to spiritual/personal growth, and that this is how individuals gradually transform culture.


He sees the process of going through depression as a part of the healing path because it pushes us to become independent of the old patterns, in search of a way to be less aligned with that which causes pain.


It's a fascinating idea, worth considering.
 
meeramew said:
It was almost like she ran into him when he ran into my head, then a few days later the universe gave me this reminder why I let go and need to remain detached when she got that information. It's all been very strange...
I would really like to get some regression therapy done. What should I expect from a session? What do you think about these coincidences,
Uh huh! This is often the case. These past life things reassert themselves in our consciousness when something in the present life is also stirring. I don't know why or how. I just have an image of those iron filings patterns that you make in school with a magnet. Did you ever do that? Things have a way of forming themselves into patterns. That's observable, but I don't know exactly why it happens.


So, I suspect that the current feelings of stress with your boyfriend and work and everything are reminding you of that period with this guy. That time when you felt out of your depth and overwhelmed and so on. You need to call on your reserves now and be strong under the brunt of this. So that's all going sort of ok, because you've learned how to do that, then 'bam' this guy pops back into your dreams and your actual life (if only at a distance).


When past life associations start floating up, it's usually because our 'psyche' is trying to remind us of an important lesson that we might be forgetting and/or sounding a kind of silent alarm to wake up that other part of ourselves that we need to call on in times of trouble. Call it 'wisdom' or 'instinct' or common sense or a guardian angel, or whatever you will. It's always there.


As to regression, the best thing to do first of all is take a look at the FAQ section of the forum. There is lots of useful information in there. Then feel free to ask any more specific questions. There are a lot of people here who've been through this sort of thing. You aren't alone. Not at all.
 
Mere Dreamer said:
I recommend taking a look at the stages of the positive disintegration theory, which do a good job of summarizing what I feel happened to me during my recovery from depression.
Basically, the sensitivity that comes from having been hurt makes us more aware of the less beneficial qualities ingrained in everyday culture and social behavior.


Depression is one of the signs of seeing and feeling the suffering and disconnection between people, especially when the problems aren't identified as part of the culture/relationship and are seen instead as symptoms of a personal failure to conform or live up to some ideal.


The theory goes on to suggest that this disintegration actually leads to spiritual/personal growth, and that this is how individuals gradually transform culture.


He sees the process of going through depression as a part of the healing path because it pushes us to become independent of the old patterns, in search of a way to be less aligned with that which causes pain.


It's a fascinating idea, worth considering.
That is beautiful, and gives hope for good to come from bad. Thanks for sharing.
 
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