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My son didn't want to be born

Val

Val

Member
My son was born on Labor day in 1999. He was a week late, but I was only in labor with him for 3 1/2 hours.

When he was two or three years old he would sometimes put his head on my stomach and say "I want back in your tummy mommy."

He was a very good baby, he slept well and seemed content. I noticed as he got older that he started getting into everything. He played ruff and loudly with his toys. He got bored quickly, and was very impulsive. In preschool he would take a toy from another child. the teacher said he didn't do it to be mean he just didn't think about it. When the teacher explained to him how the other child felt, he was sorry.

At age 5 he was diagnosed with ADHD. He is now on adderall. I took him off the meds for two weeks and his school called me several times to report behavior problems (they didn't know he was off the meds). I put him back on the meds and his teacher was amazed by the improvement in him. She asked me what had changed.

tonight while I was playing with, and talking to my son as I put him in bed, I said," Do you remember when you were a baby?" He said,"I remember when I was in your tummy, I didn't want to come out." I asked, "Why?" He replied,"Because I knew I would be like this." I asked," Like what?" He said," You know, have ADHD."

I wonder if children with ADHD have some past life issues connected with the condition?
 
Hi Val
There are a few of here who can relate to you and your son. My mom told me once that she thought I wanted to leave during the 1st 7 years I was here. Then it seemed I made up my mind to hang around.

What can you do? Remind him that those lives that are the hardest have the greatest reward during and after that lifetime. Help him discover his strenghts and build on those. What does he remember about what he was suppose to accomplish this life time? Even if he is not sure he may have some idea to one degree or another.

Jack
 
When i read your story i felt like i was seeing my son's life all over. my son was due on nov 12 2000, he was born nov 28, 2000. i was induced on tue and by wed morning nothing, finally i dialate and get to 8 and again nothing. in the end i was 16 days overdue, spent 26 hours in labor and ended up with a c-section. Now to the adhd part. when my son was 4 his preschool teacher said he showed signs of add or adhd and she thought i should have him tested. we did have him tested and they said no we don't diagnose this early. so we discussed his sleeping and found out he has a sleeping problem. i already knew this but i didn't know there was a solution. he is 5 now and has been on clonidine for a year. sleeps great and has gotten a lot better at studying and learning because he gets 8 hours of sleep a night. the doctors do say though that he may need something when he starts kindergarten this year but we have to wait til he starts to truly know. my son also has talked of past lives and has a small psychic streek in him. of course this is my observation and his. he does predict things and he has told me of 2 deaths he knows of. i just never thougth until reading your story just how the 2 might be related. i can relate to you so well and some times you just never know anyone can relate. sometimes in the midst of the moment you think how can anyone deal and then you see others doing it. i am dreading any meds though because of side effects and all. we go back to the dr tommorrow for a refill on his current script and everytime we go i pray he retracts the new meds talk. i do not want to do that. so i gotta ask how does your son do. do you have a lot of side effects. i know this gets off the subject but i had to ask.
 
Hi Val,
Welcome to the forum! I just want to say that I feel for you. I have a six year old son. At the beginning of the year we thought he had ADD. We spoke with the school counselor who believes in past lives. (My son has spoken quite extensively about his past lives but now more about the time prior to his birth) Anyway, the counselor tested him and observed him and spoke with him on many occasions. She felt that whatever is distracting him is coming from him internally, like his thoughts and not necessarily bad thoughts because he's not upset. As I watched him, I can see that this is true. He just gets wrapped up in what he's thinking. He also struggles with thinking about how others might respond to his actions. Kind of socially oblivious sometimes.
One day, he told me that he can feel/hear what other people are thinking. What it came down to after discussing it, is that when others (like kids in his class) are feeling intense emotions, he picks up on it. Can be good or bad feelings. This distracts him. He also has a lot of past life thoughts going through his head and this was also distracting him. I think the word for this is 'empath.' They can feel others thoughts etc.
As the school year has progressed, he has improved quite a bit. The counselor suggested some supplements that have helped. Its like an Omega 3 fatty acid for kids.
You might also want to look up Indigo Children on the web and see if you think this matches your son. Many Indigo Children are misdiagnosed with ADD/ADHD.
Good luck to you.
Vicky
 
Adhd diagnosis

Since my son Ryan was born in September, he attended his first year of headstart just after he turned four. Other than Ryan being very active, they didn't have many problems with him the first year. The cut off date for kindergarten was August 31, but since Ryan's birthday is Sept. 6th they went ahead and did a kindergarten readiness evaluation on him. He was borderline, so they reccommended another year of headstart. During his second year of headstart they began to have problems with him. He would do immpulsive things like take his shoes off and throw them. The teachers had to sit with him so he would stay on task, and he got kicked off the bus. The teachers advised me to have him tested for Adhd.

At this time he was very disruptive at home too. He was always getting into trouble with the nieghbors, and he couldn't seem to keep friends. His teenage sisters were ready to pack him up and mail him to the other side of the world.

After a few months of counciling, he was prescribed adderall. They start out with a very small dose and have you increase it gradually until it has the desired effect. We were warned of what to watch out for in relation to side effects, but so far (ten months) Ryan has had no side effects other than a small weight loss; this was why I took him off the meds for two weeks. Eventually his body has adjusted well and he gained back the weight. As with anything, you have to weigh the pros and cons. Ryan's quality of life is MUCH better with the meds. He does better in school and he can keep friends. His sisters can actually tolerate him now.

Ryan only takes 15mg of adderall, his best friend, also Adhd, takes 30mg plus the sleeping med at night, so different children need different amounts.

Ryan doesn't know why he choose this life, but he is very close to me, and he is able to empathize strongly with people. As far as talent goes, he is very atheletic.

I hope this helps you Diandra. I wonder if some of the afflictions we have in the present may have roots in past lives, especially the ones we are born with.
 
Indigo children

Thank you, I will look that up.

To a small extent I have always been able to "feel" people's emotions. But when I get around someone who is very disturbed I get physically upset. It is almost like they are infecting me and I have to get away from them to gain back my equalibrium.

I don't think I can feel anothers thoughts, maybe your son has learned to block it at times, so it isn't as disruptive for him?
 
I hadn't thought of that, Val. That he may have learned to block the thoughts of others. With so many of these things, I have no idea what to say or do so he kind of has to make his own way. I'm kind of like his support staff.
I'm glad the lower dose is working for Ryan. I agree that it is so important to help these kids get evened out so to speak. (with whatever method you chose) Their self esteem gets so tattered when others reposnd negatively to their behavior.
Jujitsu helped my son also with the ADD stuff.
Vicky
 
Hi Val,

Thanks for sharing with us. Ryan's story really touched me, and I just wanted to share something I've heard regarding the following:

I wonder if some of the afflictions we have in the present may have roots in past lives, especially the ones we are born with.
Click to expand...

Several times I have heard that certain souls choose to experience different "afflictions" in each life -- and the ones that choose the most difficult paths, are the ones who are more highly evolved. Sometimes they do not come to learn a lesson -- but rather to teach one. They are often our greatest teachers. ;)

I'm glad to hear that Ryan is doing well now.

Ailish
 
Hi All,

I just think it is wonderful how much you help your son and his soul during his time here on Earth. He chose a beautiful mother in you...

With love to all,
Craig
 
Wow.

When I was a kid, I didn't want to be here either. I was convinced my life was just a dream, and I'd wake up at anytime. I was sad all the time. I knew I was different and I knew my life would be a struggle. I was diagnosed with ADD and bi-polar disorder.
 
;)
diandra1010 said:
When i read your story i felt like i was seeing my son's life all over. my son was due on nov 12 2000, he was born nov 28, 2000. i was induced on tue and by wed morning nothing, finally i dialate and get to 8 and again nothing. in the end i was 16 days overdue, spent 26 hours in labor and ended up with a c-section. Now to the adhd part. when my son was 4 his preschool teacher said he showed signs of add or adhd and she thought i should have him tested. we did have him tested and they said no we don't diagnose this early. so we discussed his sleeping and found out he has a sleeping problem. i already knew this but i didn't know there was a solution. he is 5 now and has been on clonidine for a year. sleeps great and has gotten a lot better at studying and learning because he gets 8 hours of sleep a night. the doctors do say though that he may need something when he starts kindergarten this year but we have to wait til he starts to truly know. my son also has talked of past lives and has a small psychic streek in him. of course this is my observation and his. he does predict things and he has told me of 2 deaths he knows of. i just never thougth until reading your story just how the 2 might be related. i can relate to you so well and some times you just never know anyone can relate. sometimes in the midst of the moment you think how can anyone deal and then you see others doing it. i am dreading any meds though because of side effects and all. we go back to the dr tommorrow for a refill on his current script and everytime we go i pray he retracts the new meds talk. i do not want to do that. so i gotta ask how does your son do. do you have a lot of side effects. i know this gets off the subject but i had to ask.
Click to expand...

:butbut:
Hi there. I saw your post and am hoping that you will review this post again.... You mentioned that your son's Dr. was talking about starting him on something when he starts school.
My son (now 18) sounds much like yours. From the time Brandon was just a small baby, I knew that he was different, something was amiss. :o If it sounds possible at all, he was definately born an angry soul. Still is, not as violently angry, but angry still. At what? My only guess because of his behavior, and never having been exposed to any kind of abuse or negativety like that, it must have been a past life. He had an imagination that was just out of this world; or should I say 'I' thought it was his imagination. Brandon told me and family members whenever he could get us to listen, as we'd heard it so many times and thought it was just a story. But he told us about hunting and getting killed by a bear and of being a logger and working in the woods. My whole family still talks about the stories Brandon would tell as a child. :rolleyes:
: angel I too, have been raised and live in the Bible Belt, and fully understand what you mean when you said that people here just do not accept or even consider that reincarnation is real or a possibility.:eek: If I even questioned whether or not it was his imagination I was very frowned upon, so I just convinced myself that my son may just be the next Stephen King! :tongue:
Brandon definately had ADHD. He was given the TOVA test by the Adolescent and Child Psychiatrist that I worked for. I tried first changing his diet and giving him nothing that contained red dye or sugar, but that did work either. Finally, as a last resort and only because the school was constantly complaining, I agreed to put him on Ritalin. He stayed on Ritalin from kindergarten through eighth grade.
My point here is, I learned so much from working for a psychiatrist, and most of it isn't good. No, they aren't all bad, but there are so many (especially in our area) that will think your crazy talking about a past life, and definately have you and your son on an antipsychotic drugs. I've seen this happen with my own eyes. So many psychiatrists only view things in a medical perspective, and that's the way they treat their patients, with medication for what they believe is a malfuntion or chemical imbalance in the brain. Never considering for one second that children do sometimes remember past lives.
Please, before you allow any Dr. to put your child on any medication, please tell your Dr. that you want a second opinion and that you'll get back with him. Try to find a psychologist/psychiatris that does work with children who have past life memories. It makes a world of difference in how your child and you, will be viewed as well as treatment.
My children and I are a psychic, my daughter moreso than my son. Being adopted, my adoptive parents were very quick to reprimand me for telling things that were about to happen, cry when I knew that a relative was in grave danger and had died, or told them about something about to happen. It was very unacceptable to my adoptive family. I did recently find my biological Father and discovered that he, as well as my two brothers were psychic. I never knew until then that it was hereditary. Of Interest: on a weekend visit with one of my bio-brothers, our spouses were talking and comparing notes about us, and discovered that we both do something very weird in our sleep. We both will sit up and act as if we are totally awake, and chant and talk in a strange language. We talked to other family, and learned that all of the men on my birth father's side of the family are Chippawa Indians, and my father and five uncles, grandfather, great and great great grandfathers are in the Chippawa Tribe. The language that is mostly spoken is Algonquin. We're not certain if the chanting that we both do in our sleep is the Algonquin language, but it's certainly a possibility. Sorry this was so long.
I would love to hear more about your son and what happens.
Love N Light,
Melsie
 
Melsie,

Have you ever read any threads on this forum about xenoglossy? You might find them interesting.

Also, do you think your husband would agree to tape you when you do this? It would be amazing to find out what language it is.

Vicky
 
vicky said:
Melsie,

Have you ever read any threads on this forum about xenoglossy? You might find them interesting.

Also, do you think your husband would agree to tape you when you do this? It would be amazing to find out what language it is.

Vicky
Click to expand...
:confused: Hi Vicky,
No, I've never heard of xenoglossy. I'll search it and see if I can find the posts and read up on it. I did buy a mini cassette voice recorder specifically for this purpose, because I wanted to see what it sounded like for myself. So far, by the time Lee awakes and hears it and gets it, I've usually stopped by the time he gets the recorder. Eventually we'll get it on tape. I'm anxious to see what it's like. Before finding out about birth family history, I thought it was just probably mumbling while talking in my sleep. I've talked in my sleep since being able to talk as a baby and walked in my sleep as well. My adoptive mother has told me often about me getting up during the night and going outside to play, being sound asleep. She said she never tried to wake me, but rather would sit on the porch and watch me to make sure I was safe and didn't venture away from our house.
Thanks for sharing this, I'll definately read up on it.
Melsie
 
:butbut: Hi Vicky,
I did go and search and read about this. I really don't know what to say, I'm astounded. I've never heard of this before and didn't even know it was possible. Maybe I'm not as weird as I thought I was!! LOL!:D
I do think (this is just my opinion) that it could have something to do with being Chippawa. I've always had a very partial and protective feeling toward Indians, and until October 2004 when I found my birth father, I didn't know that the family was Chippawa and in the tribe. When I was in second grade, our music teacher was teaching us a song called "Blue Lake and Rocky Shores". It was about an indian brave boy who built a wigwam and was leaving his home, but vowed to return. I felt such a kinship. I didn't want anyone singing about 'my people'. Even then, I thought it strange. I tried to talk to my mother about it, but was brushed off and rediculed, so I never said another word about it...until I got in trouble in music class for arguing with the teacher. She was explaining to the class how the indians use to build wigwams (canoes). Before I realized what I was doing, I'd opened my mouth and was vehemently protesting what she was telling the class and telling her that she was wrong, and trying to explain to her how they were 'really' built. Needless to say, I was sent to the principals office and given a stern talking to and my mom was called and told about it. I had never been exposed at all to how wigwams were built, and had no knowledge in my little life about indians whatsoever.
It was at about that age that the commercial for 'clean up America' came on, that had the indian standing by a poluted lake and it showed a tear running down his face. This commercial would always make me cry.
In school learning history about the indians and the trail of tears, I would automatically get so mad I would be shaking. I would be furious and have thoughts like, 'I hate the white man'. Now, mind you, I'm about as white as white can get. Blonde, fair complected. So, maybe it was a past life. Until now, I've never really thought that there was a connection with all of this. But with me and my brother both doing this in our sleep, I tend to think that it was a past life and this is why I identify with indians and their suffering. When I met my brother for the first time, we ran into each others arms and were crying, we were so happy to see each other. I know that I have known him before. We have a very strong and connected bond. I'm sure he was someone close and loved by me in another life.
When and if Lee can manage to get this recorded, I will send it to someone in the forum that can put it online. I'm not very computer friendly.:rolleyes:
Thanks so much, Vicky, you've given me much to think about.
Melsie
 
Very interesting Melsie. My son talks about a past life as an indian. He's 6 now and is in the middle of 'processing' this life. He acts it all out in his play. As I type this, he is sitting at my feet using a knife to sharpen a piece of wood that will be a 'spear.' He also tries to knapp flint or rocks in his case, rub sticks together to make fire, makes his own bows and arrows etc. He also has an amazing skill with a bow and arrow and has since he was three years old.

A lot of little boys are interested in those things but my little guy seems to be extreme. Your story of telling your teacher she was wrong about wigwams was similar to some things my son has said. I think its hard for a child to make sense of 'memories.' Therefore, they don't really understand that what they are experiencing is past life recall. You mentioned in another post that reincarnation was a scoffable belief in your community and family so how could you ever know what was really happening?

It seems like when you really become aware that all of these things all of your life are or at least can be past life related, then the memories and things like xenoglossy really start to emerge and happen more frequently.

I hope Lee can catch you on tape soon. Does he believe in reincarnation?

Vicky
 
Hi Vicky,

Your son sounds like an interesting young man! It's amazing to me how children can just 'know' some of the things they do. It gives a whole new meaning to the Bible passage "out of the mouth of babes..".
Growing up I was always curious, my to my mother's dismay. I couldn't understand why I had to believe things just because someone said it was so. Being a child and just wanting to understand wasn't really popular here in the Bible belt. The answer always seemed to be "just because".
I was raised Christian, and while I still hold to many of those beliefs, I do think that part of the Bible was omitted to suit early churches own beliefs, and there was information on reincarnation in the original Bible scripts. Just my opinion....
I do know this much, I PRAY that reincarnation is real, because there's just no way that I'm going to be perfect enough for heaven in just one lifetime. LOL! I'm afraid I need MANY to get it right. :D
My husband is kind of on the fence about reincarnation. He too being from a Bible belt small town where we were expected to do and believe what the majority of the community thought was right.
He started questioning things when we moved into a home that was very much filled with spirits. We went through a lot and it took a long time before we were able to be happy in our home without being afraid. My 'sensitivity' also left him questioning his basic beliefs. Too much was 'coincidence' for there not to be something to it.
Hopefully, when I do it again he can catch me and tape it. The down side to this, is that he and I work different schedules, so if it doesn't happen before 12:30-1:00am, he's gone to work after that.
Can't wait to hear more about your son.
Melsie
 
Hi Melsie,

I was also raised Christian and the answer to 'why do we believe things that don't make sense?' was always to just have faith. Even as a child I thought this seemed ignorant.

I also still hold many of the same beliefs but they seem to be quickly falling away the more I learn. In my opinion, reincarnation answers all of the questions I've ever had and to my satisfaction.

It seems like there are many members of this forum that had experiences like yours as a child. Myself included. I've always wondered what our lives would have been like, what we could have become if we'd been believed and supported.

However, my son is free to share whatever he feels, whatever is happening to him but he seems hesitant. I think this is due to two things, --confusion on his part as to where these 'memories come from and he is starting to become aware of the belief systems of others. His uncle laughed at him when my son told him that he doesn't want to go to sleep at night because he is afraid that his uncle from his last life is going to come back and take him back to that life.

So, I guess things are as they are meant to be and they become what they will whether a child is believed/supported or not.

Vicky
 
Hi Vicky,

I totally agree with you. I think that criticism from adults or being laughed at, totally shuts them down. It did me. When I was little, I saw people's auras. I thought it was normal and didn't think anything of it. As I got a little older and scorned for telling my parents 'psychic' things that I saw, I guess I 'grew' out of seeing auras. I can still see the energy around a person, but I can't see the colors brightly like I could when I was young. I had grown up and forgotten about seeing it, and didn't even know a name for it, until after Lee and I married. His mother is very 'new age' and had a book on auras that she showed me. Then, the memory of seeing auras came flooding back. I do remember as a child, knowing whether the person was nice or mean, etc., just by the colors in their auras. I often wonder how I would be today if I had been believe and encouraged to share what I saw and experienced as a child, instead of being made to feel ashamed of.

It's so good that you're an open mother and can let your son talk and express himself without fear of ridicule. Maybe you can just explain to him that some people (adults) forget as they get older and don't understand, maybe like his uncle. I hope the uncle's comments don't hamper or make Christian feel ashamed of sharing.

You're beliefs sound so much like mine. I've just kept my thoughts to myself really, because I don't know anyone in my life that does believe in reincarnation, other than myself. It's nice to find a place to talk to others and share thoughts.

Love and Light,
melissa
 
Dear Sara and Val,

Let me begin by addressing Sara P. I also have bipolar disorder and when younger, did not want to be born until I decided I was born right here right now for very good reasons. I can't believe the universe happens just by chance, we have been who we were and are who are for reasons. I hope you agree with this statement, or will in the future.

Val, I've got to say that many many many kids labelled ADHD are incorrectly diagnosed. It's to the point of ridiculous. Your son sounds like a deep thinker and this is commonly misunderstood. I'm no professional, only a young teenager, but I dearly love many people that have had the ADD related terms slapped on them.

That being said, everyone with a disorder or thought to have a disorder has at some point, if not long periods of their lives, wished they had not "been born like this." They are looked down on, plain and simple. Sadly, they are highly looked down on by their parents. Don't worry, I'm not accusing you of anything. I know a certain young boy labelled with ADHD who has a wonderful mother and an amazing life. The problem is, I see all too many more "disabled" kids with parents who constantly remind them that they're different/not normal/"retarded." I've been in that position myself, and have been misdiagnosed with autism, as I believe my past lives would have been had there not been much less disability labelling before my generation.

Sincerly,
Prudence...Nancy?
 
Hi Prudence,
Your post about ADD/ADHD children being misdiagnosed is so very true!
About 10 years ago, I was office manager for a Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, and that was the most frustrating job I've ever had. Let me give you and example...
Probably 70% of the children that we saw on a regular basis were children diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, ranging in ages from 5-18. Of these 70%, only about 10% actually had a 'true' diagnosis of attention deficit disorder. The others were being seen for 'frivolous' reasons.
The majority of the remaining 60% of these kids had uneducated parents who just didn't spend time with the children, and the kids were acting out their frustrations on the concept that 'bad attention is better than no attention at all'. How sad this is.
I saw sooooo many kids who were being heavily medicated for this under the umbrella diagnosis of ADD/ADHD; when all they truly needed were parents who would spend time with their children, instead of most of them being parked in front of a TV without parental monitoring of what they're children were watching. (and most of these parents couldn't understand why their children were displaying violent behavior, when they were allowed to watch violence on TV)
By the way some of these children were dressed, physically dirty and unkempt, and many abused, it was very obvious to us in the office that these children were not ADD/ADHD, but were desperately needing love and attention.
After watching this sort of thing happening for a few years, I sat our psychiatrist down and tried to talk to him about my and other coworkers observations. I was shocked at what he had to say...He told me that almost all of those children with that diagnosis and being medicated, were being done so simply because it wasn't the child that was the problem or ADD/ADHD, it was the parents who were the problem. That the medications were simply a 'tool' that is used to calm the children to help lessen the inadequate parents' anxieties, and to hopefully make the children's lives more bearable and lessen abuse.
That Is Soooooo Wrong! But you would definately be surprised at how often this happens.
Having been raised by parents who criticized me for sharing the things that I saw and sharing premonitions that I would have very young. I know first hand what parents like this can do to a child. Children are born so loving and innocent, and to be told they 'aren't good enough', 'are crazy', and are 'problem' children. Undoing the damage from these children often takes a lifetime or aren't addressed at all.
Oh, and some of these children are Indigo or Crystal children. They're special.
Moms/ Parents who take time to spend with their children are truly a gift; parents who recognize and accept 'gifted' children are priceless!
Love and Light,
Melissa
 
Not discounting anything you said Melsie, since I'm sure what you wrote is true, but I think all children are special. I think one of the big problems in society, and especially in America, is that so many families feel that material things mean success. Until it's considered OK not to have TVs, or cell phones, or any number of things, for every member of a family, children will often come in second to a paycheck.

When I was a teen in the 60s, if I wanted something that wasn't really needed, I had to earn money to pay for it. Today, it seems, youngsters are given things so parents won't feel so guilty ignoring them.

John
 
Melsie said:
Hi Prudence,
Your post about ADD/ADHD children being misdiagnosed is so very true!
About 10 years ago, I was office manager for a Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist, and that was the most frustrating job I've ever had. Let me give you and example...
Probably 70% of the children that we saw on a regular basis were children diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, ranging in ages from 5-18. Of these 70%, only about 10% actually had a 'true' diagnosis of attention deficit disorder. The others were being seen for 'frivolous' reasons.
The majority of the remaining 60% of these kids had uneducated parents who just didn't spend time with the children, and the kids were acting out their frustrations and the concept that 'bad attention is better than no attention at all'. How sad this is.
I saw sooooo many kids who were being heavily medicated for this under the umbrella diagnosis of ADD/ADHD; when all the truly needed were parents who would spend time with their children, instead of most of them being parked in front of a TV without parental monitoring of what they're children were watching. (and most of these parents couldn't understand why their children were displaying violent behavior, when they were allowed to watch violence on TV)
By the way some of these children were dressed, physically dirty and unkempt, and many abused, it was very obvious to us in the office that these children were not ADD/ADHD, but were desperately needing love an attention.
After watching this sort of thing happening for a few years, I sat our psychiatrist down and tried to talk to him about my and other coworkers observations. I was shocked at wht he had to say...He told me that almost all of those children with that diagnosis and being medicated, were being done so, simply because it wasn't the child that was the problem or ADD/ADHD, it was the parents who were the problem. That the medications were simply a 'tool' that is used to calm the children to help lessen the inadequate parents' anxieties, and to hopefully make the children's lives more bearable and lessen abuse.
That Is Soooooo Wrong! But you would definately be surprised at how often this happens.
Having been raised by parents who criticized me for sharing the things that I saw and sharing premonitions that I would have very young, I know first hand what parents like this can do to a child. Children are born so loving and innocent, and to be told they 'aren't good enough', 'are crazy', and are 'problem' children. Undoing the damage from these children often take a lifetime or aren't addressed at all.
Oh, and some of these children are Indigo or Crystal children. They're special.
Moms/ Parents who take time to spend with their children are truly a gift; parents who recognize and accept 'gifted' children are priceless!
Love and Light,
Melissa
Click to expand...


Oh, how much I agree with every word you said!

I tutor a 9 year old boy suppossedly with ADHD, and am good friends with another 9 year old boy with the same label.

E., the first boy, is abused by his mother, his adoptive mother. She's horribly obese (meaning no offense to the overweight. I'm sure no one here is 700 pounds!) and spends her entire time "eating ice cream and slapping the children." She consistently tells E. "you're a retarded child haHAAAA," and E. is to the point where he believes he is. He cannot read and write at age 9. :_(
I'll be trying to teach him to read, and he'll run off into the pantry, lock himself in, and eat beans and frank. His mother never pays me because she thinks I do an awful job. I do everything anyone could do - - SHE is the terrible person doing an awful job. Poor boy can barely talk.

B., the second boy, is the son of a misunderstood but truly wonderful lady. I have nothing against adoptive parents, because his mother has truly adopted me in her heart. Since she grew up misunderstood and is medicated for bipolar and borderline at this moment, she could never in a million years look down on her son. On the contrary, she is the most sympathetic and understanding mother I've ever had the pleasure of knowing, and her son is a highly intelligent, active, happy kid.
 
tiltjlp said:
When I was a teen in the 60s, if I wanted something that wasn't really needed, I had to earn money to pay for it. Today, it seems, youngsters are given things so parents won't feel so guilty ignoring them.
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You were a teen in the 60s? I love (some aspects of) the 60s. I'm an exception to my own generation; I have to earn my money and budget it.
 
Prudence said:
You were born in the 60s? I love (some aspects of) the 60s. I'm an exception to my own generation; I have to earn my money and budget it.
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No, I was a teen in the 60s. I was born in the dark ages back in 1946! As for having to earn and budget your own money, you'll learn some valuable lessons that way.

John
 
tiltjlp said:
No, I was a teen in the 60s. I was born in the dark ages back in 1946! As for having to earn and budget your own money, you'll learn some valuable lessons that way.

John
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I saw my error and edited it, but too late.
 
After reading the post about the mis-diognosis of ADD/ADHD, I believe that many children have probably been mis- diognosed; however I think there are some true cases of ADD/ADHD.

My son Ryan is the youngest in the family so he gets alot of attention from all family members, includding grandparents. We read to him, talk to him, take him for walks, and play with him.

While I believe the attention he gets helps, without his medication, Ryan can't focus enough to learn to read, write, or do math. He becomes extremely impulsive and does things that can be dangerous to him and others.

Ryan has a high IQ, while he is on medication he can learn quickly. He becomes very focused and advances quickly in his schoolwork. When not on meds he will disrupt the class, and not be able to do his schoolwork.

Ryan is an active almost-seven-year-old boy. Without the medication he is extremely loud, hyper, impulsive and distructive. With the meds he can still be noisy at times, and a little hyper, but much less distructive and impulsive; more like a normal active boy.

So while there are many children who are on mecication for ADD/ADHD that probably shouldn't be; some children need the medication just to lead a normal life. Parents should weigh the pros and cons. If your child can function and learn without the meds than that is great, but some children need the medication.
 
Val, thank you for sharing Ryan's story with us. It's good to see both sides of any situation. It's a shame Ryan needs medication, but the changes you mentioned must be heartwarming. It's wonderful that you have the support of your family. Continued good luck and best wishes for Ryan and your family.

John
 
Val,

I guess this is for you and others who may have misunderstood what I meant. I too, believe that ALL children are special. What I am trying to say is, that from my stand point of working in the medical field with physicians who treat children and teens, the large percentage of these children that are diagnosed with ADD/ADHD, many of them do not need to be medicated, but are. Many of these children do not get the love and attention from parents that they desperately need. Yes, there are children that are TRULY ADD/ADHD and that very much need the medication and it truly helps them. I fully agree with what you were saying. I just mean from a profession in the medical field, we see all of those children. Not just the percentage of them that have loving and caring parents. From working closely through the years with the school and AARD committee when my son was growing up, most teachers, principals, and AARD committee members, will tell you that the majority of the children who are treated with medication for ADD/ADHD are not true ADD/ADHD children. They are children that are seeking attention for what they don't get at home. Bad attention is better than no attention.
So, please accept my apology, I didn't mean to offend anyone. I'm not just a mother of an ADHD child, I worked in the field and saw these situations on a daily basis.
We're all entitled to our own opinions, and I treasure the point of view from others who don't always agree with me. Helps me not be so narrow minded, and stay open to other ideas.
Love and Light,
Melissa
 
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