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My Past Life Regression

horsedoc

horsedoc

Member
I wanted to share with you what I wrote the day after my past life regression back in 2010. My brother had committed suicide after battling a long illness. It devastated me and my family. I have always been searching for answers, within different religions, through meditation, many books by Brian Weiss, Michael Newton and others. I had always wanted to do a past life reading and this was the catalyst that has changed my life for the better. Well here is my story (it may be a little raw but was what came to me as I wrote it :tongue:)

My Past Life Regression on January 26, 2010

I have wanted to do this for a long time. I have read various books over the past 10 years trying to discover the one question that plagues us all, “THE meaning of life”. I have always felt that I was an “older soul” but I could not pinpoint why. I knew undergoing a past-life regression was a major event in one’s life, and I did not know if I was ready for it. After the passing of my eldest brother Shawn, I knew it was time to explore the answers to all my questions. I made my appointment 6 months in advance to prepare myself, and undergo the hours of training it would take to prepare my essence for this experience. Yesterday as I pulled into the office of the woman who would lead me to discover myself, I felt nervous excitement, yet at peace for the experience I was about to undertake.

To have a successful regression I had to connect with my soul, and feel the energy of the universe flow through me, which after the hours of preparation I had. During my prep time, there were times where I felt fully disconnected from my body, and knew it was just a vessel for my soul.

We began with the relaxing techniques that I have practiced over these many months. Quickly I felt the connection to my soul and we began the regression. It began as a series of stairs that represented each year of my life. Lynn (my hypnotherapist) had me pause at the step that represented my 10th year of life. I stepped through a white door to view myself and there I was 10 years old, happy on a hill top. My feeling was that I need to enjoy life, and live it to its fullest. As I stepped back through the door, we again paused at my first year of life. I saw myself in my first house, crawling next to a couch, learning the tools I would need to survive this life. I had a feeling that life is difficult, and during our younger years we learn the tools we will need to survive. We again continued through this year, and then upon a landing. Standing before me were more stairs, which each individual stair represented a life I have lived.
 
cont.


After another round of relaxing exercises I took one step, and stepped through a black door. I immediately saw myself as an American soldier, in my full battle gear standing smoking a cigarette watching some Vietnamese women wash clothes by a river. This was taking place around 1967, I was young (~ 22 yo), had on glasses and sandy blond hair. I was feeling frustrated, scared, I definitely did not want to be there, or in Vietnam for that matter. I was looking across the river and was frightened at the jungle across from me; I felt there was a monster in the foliage that was out to get us all. Next, I saw myself on the ground with a look of absolute horror on my face. I could sense bullets whizzing by me, tracers coming from the jungle across the river. I took cover behind a wagon, and saw the Vietnamese women run by me to safety. I felt isolated and alone and knew I had to get to my foxhole. The village was under attack and we were there to defend it. I finally dove into my foxhole, returning fire. We radioed in some airstrikes and it finally quieted down. This was not my death scene, as I survived the attack. What happened next completely and utterly blew me away. I was not prepared for this.


Lynn asked me why I was shown this scene. What was the purpose behind it? Then a complete wave of emotion swept through my body. I felt it radiate from my head to my feet and then I was sobbing. I was so unprepared for the incredible sadness I felt. (Side note- this was the confirmation that I needed that this experience was real, the incredibly strong emotions you feel). It was chosen to show me that the immediate life I led before my current life was not a waste. I had helped save that village, and saved those Vietnamese women. I was carrying around such a sense and burden of feeling as a “failure”. It was chosen to show me that the life I had in Vietnam was not a failure. I had SAVED people, not just killed them.


Lynn then took me to my last day in that life, which was about 6-8 weeks after the defense of the village. I saw myself with one of my best friends in Vietnam in a trench laughing as we ate our dinner from a tin can. He was black and I think his name was “Charlie”. I got confused because we could have been talking about “Charlie” or what others call the Viet Cong. My name was Jay, or they called me Jay, it could have been John. We were laughing and talking, and it was shown to me to remind me that we were still human; we could find the good side of ourselves, even in the worst of circumstances (War).


Later my friend “Charlie “and I were manning an observation post. We immediately saw flares going off and tracers coming from the jungle in front of us. We frantically tried to defend our fighting position and then a bright flash. I felt that we got hit by a rocket propelled grenade, or maybe artillery strike directly on our position. I viewed my body from behind and saw myself slumped over. Not sure if I had died yet. I looked to my left and saw my friend “Charlie” dead, eyes wide open and mouth agape. I immediately began to sob again, harder this time, at seeing my good friend dead. I felt that I had failed him. The emotion was so strong, so intense, it is hard to describe. Lynn reminded me that I was protected viewing this scene and I calmed down some. I saw the VC run over our position as the battle raged around me. I began to lift up and over our bodies and out of the jungle canopy. I noticed I was surrounded by starts and was being pulled away from Earth. I did not notice a tunnel of bright light so many people reported in experiencing near death experiences, but I did notice myself becoming enveloped in the brightest white light you can imagine.
 
cont.


I was greeted by my soul guide Ethan. I did not recognize him at first as he was wearing a white suite, white tie and shirt. He had salt and pepper hair and beard. (Later as I awoke from this experience I got the symbolism of his “costume”. Lynn told me many guides come in costume and this one seemed to be an inside joke. He looked like the Architect from the movie the Matrix, and it was to symbolize that he was the architect of all my lives, funny Ethan!!). Ethan greeted me and behind him I saw my friend Charlie who had just died with me. He was beaming a bright smile and greeted me. I began to sob again and kept apologizing to him, I was so sorry to see him die. He reassured me that he was fine, great in fact. I calmed down and seemed to accept our fates. This was a theme in this life, “FAILURE”, and is why in this life I am so scared of failing at anything. It was a very interesting insight into my current personality.


Ethan, with a hand to my back guided me into the spirit world. To me it looked like a large shopping mall, but not a shopping mall. There was so much activity around me. We made a quick stop into a room, that I can only describe as a large round white room. I met a woman, who I called Jane, and she might have been another one of my guides, it was hard to pinpoint.


We left that scene and I was continued to be guided by Ethan into another larger oval white room. There was a flurry of activity. Some of it was blurry to me, but I immediately noticed my two brothers, Shawn and Joe in almost a cocoon like state, heads bowed and in deep concentration. I had realized at this point that they were already back on earth. If it was truly 1967, both of them had been born already. Then out of nowhere Melissa, my sister, bounded to me. She was radiant, a gorgeous smile beaming, she seemed to have freckles and curly brown hair with a red tint. She hugged me and kept telling me how proud she was of me for getting through this life. She was so happy to see me that I started to tear up as I realized my siblings were members of my immediate soul group. I felt loved and realized that we all have worked so hard together. Additionally, I felt that the number in my soul group totaled 8, but I could not pinpoint who the other 4 were (saving for my next regression to clarify this).


I began to search for Ashley (current wife). She was not a member of my immediate soul group but she came flying into my mind. I immediately began to laugh, as I realized that Ashley was so mischievous, feisty, and that we have lived many lives together. (Later Lynn would tell me that we live with many other souls repetitively that we feel close to). I could feel Ashley’s strengths; she was very intelligent, very intuitive and supportive. When we decide to have challenging lives, and we need the support we incarnate together. We have lived lives as husband and wife, and I had a glimmer of a life with her as my older sister. At the time of our meeting, Ashley was on earth living near Chicago. Ashley had a light green aura and is a slightly older soul than I.
 
cont.


Next Lynn led me to cultures that I have felt drawn to my entire life. We first began to explore my interest in the Japanese culture, and my fear of flying. Lynn asked me if my fear was based on a dream I had back in 1990 of my sister Melissa and I blowing up in mid-air then crashing into the ocean. I had a vivid image of the flag of the rising sun, and I saw us both in a Japanese dive bomber. I had always felt I was the pilot but I was wrong. Melissa was the pilot and I was the bombardier. We both had mustaches and she was younger ~ 19 and her name was “Riyuki” and I felt I was 22 and name was “Hakimura”. The intense emotions I felt were one of invincibility. I described it as hubris, because we felt we were unstoppable. We had been winning victory after victory, and the Americans were going to be defeated. The lesson I was learning was to be cautious of “Nationalism”. I felt like my life didn’t matter and I would die for my country without a second thought. Then that sense of invincibility left us, I think at the battle of Midway, where we were soundly defeated and I saw an image of our dive bomber cart wheeling into the ocean.


I felt I had lived many lives in Japan, ~20-30, and the next image flashed was of a bloody civil war. I had such a sense of emotion of bloodlust, of how cruel we can be, and how cruel and blood thirst I was. It was a very uncomfortable feeling.


We next began to explore my draw to the American Indian culture. I felt I had lived lives as a Crowe, Sioux and Huron Indian. My most recent life was as a Crowe Indian. I was taken to ~1870 where I had a vision of my village. We were having a “pow wow”, our spirit man was dancing as some sort of animal which I could not discern, and I had a feeling of joy and happiness. My feelings that I began to describe were one of displacement. I described it as a big puzzle with all the pieces being jumbled. As the Europeans began to push west, tribes were being pushed farther and farther West. It was a chain reaction that as tribes moved; they fought and pushed others out of their ancestral lands. We began to fight other tribes over the resources, over our hunting grounds.
 
Next I was taken to an early morning, where our small village came under attack. I rushed out of my teepee telling my “mate” (in my mind it was clearly MATE not wife, which I found interesting), to take our two young children and escape. I rushed out wearing my animal skin leggings, I had long dark black hair, and I was carrying a spear. I was rushing towards approximately 30 warriors from the Blackfoot tribe. We were so few, against so many. My goal was to buy enough time to let my family escape (at the time my hip began to hurt, which later it got worse and Lynn and I investigated why and that I was still carrying around anger from this particular lifetime that I needed to let go of). I was immediately hit with a spear in my left hip and I hit the ground. A warrior came up to me and hit me in the head with a club and I was gone. Our entire village was wiped out. I felt so angry, so infuriated and the only thing that crossed my mind was VENGENCE, because my wife and children were also killed. Lynn investigated why I had come to such a terrible demise, and I learned that it was a Karmic lesson from my previous lives. As you will see, as a Roman, as a Viking, I was violent and uncaring. This was a lesson to be on the receiving end of such violence. This experience was so vivid, and so emotionally draining. Later I realized that I was still carrying onto this memory, and still had anger in me.


My life as a Huron Indian was one of peace and connecting with nature. I saw myself as a spirit woman, releasing a dove (symbol of peace). I was connecting with nature and saw myself in the mountains of southern Canada or upstate New York. Additionally, my life as a Sioux was one of happiness. I thought and felt that the “white man” had not yet come and it seemed to be a relatively peaceful existence


Next Lynn asked me about my connection to England. I was immediately filled with a sense of pride. I had visions of armor, ships and the façade of a large church. I did not feel that I had anything to address from those lives, but I was proud of merry ole England and the lives I have lived there. I reminded myself to not feel overconfident or hubris.


Next Lynn asked me about my lives as a Roman. I felt I had lived a handful of lives in Rome, and I was a soldier in the Roman Legion. What did come through was just how violent I was, and how uncaring. I saw wholesale slaughter and I appalled at who I was. Lynn reminded me at this time that we all are like that as young souls, and have all lived lives like that. I was just disgusted at who I was, how I could kill without thought, and could care less about those I hurt. It is amazing to think of the changes in my soul over the millennia. I am not capable of committing such violence today, but back then I did. I also had visions of Ethan my soul guide and I as Vikings, and again we were very violent men. We actually began to laugh, as we thought back to how we could have ever been like that. It actually gave me some sense of peace that I have learned the lessons that I needed to advance my development.
 
cont.


Lynn then brought me back to one of my most important questions, and that was of my brother Shawn. We began to explore the lives we have lived together and one clearly came through. I had a vision of Shawn as a very, and I mean VERY powerful Mongolian chieftain in 1320. I didn’t call him Ghengis Khan (later I looked up that Ghengis lived in 1162), but he was almost as powerful as him. Both Joe and I were his younger brothers and supported him during his rule. He looked like a giant to me, and a bit scary. He protected both Joe and I during this time.


To interrupt quickly, I have thought deeply about this and now know why Shawn made the trip to Mongolia. I think he had such a strong draw to there, at a time when he was almost invincible. That he went back to reconnect with his soul at a time when he wasn’t sick, when he could overcome any obstacle.


To continue, I then viewed Shawn studying hard for his next life. He was deep in thought of what he had to accomplish. It came to me that he will be coming back to LA to be the child of a famous celebrity (I was not sure who but Gwen/Gavin came to mind). Shawn had not finished his work in this most recent life, and needed to come back to continue his philanthropy work. I immediately began to well up with tears as I felt his sorrow. He was sorry for his suicide, but also for not being more involved with our lives. I felt his struggles, and how he felt so weak. I began to understand, that the reason I was shown his life as a powerful Mongolian chieftain was that he struggled with his body and his illness. It was one of his karmic lessons to be in a less powerful body. Additionally, he needed to come back to this existence to finish the work he didn’t complete in this life. He seemed to be in deep concentration and working hard in preparation.


As we moved on, Lynn asked me if I had any future lives planned. I could clearly see three. My next life will be as a Tibetan Buddhist Monk. Lynn asked me if I have lived in Tibet before. A scene flashed in my eyes of me as a Tibetan trader, and I was coming down a mountain path on my horse leading a pack mule. I was ambushed and killed by bandits. I didn’t have much emotion about this life, but again this was a Karmic lesson against violence, and maybe some payback from someone I had harmed in a previous life. I had a feeling that Ashley and Shawn would be joining me as Buddhist monks. Another life that I have possibly planned is to live back in Mongolia as a horseman with Shawn Joe and possibly Melissa and Ashley, and then Brazil flashed in my mind. I think I am done living in the United States for a while.
 
That is a summary of the over 2 hours I was under. As I awoke back into my body, I was still out of it for much of the evening. I couldn’t focus my eyes very much and still felt detached. Yet it was the most amazing, eye opening experience I have ever had. A major lesson I have learned is that to trust your instincts, that many of the things that flash into our minds about us and our souls is true. I am at peace with my brother’s death, and I do realize that we will be together again. The people that make major impacts in our lives are there for a reason, and we more than likely have led, and will continue to have many lives together.


Overall, love, it is the single most important emotion we share, and we have more souls, energies, and people that love us than we can imagine. It is easy to lose sight of that as we struggle here on Earth. I highly suggest that if anyone has a draw to undergoing a past life regression to DO IT. It will change your life. I have another session planned in the future, to answer the questions that were raised this time around, and to investigate the relationships with my parents and close friends.


Peace and Love.


-------------------------------------------------------


Thanks to Nightrain for encouraging me to share this. I did do a second regression a month after to tie up anymore loose ends but unfortunately did not make a summary. I do have it on a CD though and need to listen to it again.
 
Thank you for sharing this Horsedoc! And also welcome.


I am pleased you had such a deep and intensive regression, as did I. And I wholeheartedly agree that it is a life changing event. The emotional roller coaster for me was very heavy. The session was recorded and I still cannot listen to the pain that came out of it.


I'm glad you found some peace and understanding with your brother's life. Did you say your brother made a trip to Mongolia? That is an important piece of his life and the memories that probably laid hidden under his consciousness.


I'm with you 100% on the single greatest power we have ...love. Thank you again, I look forward to more of your posts.


Tinkerman
 
Thanks Tinkerman,


Indeed he did travel to Mongolia two years prior to his death. My brother was an artist and photographer. He traveled quite a bit, mostly between Europe and the U.S. However, he had two major places he wanted to visit in his life, Ethiopia and later Mongolia. I was actually stunned he wanted to go to of all places Mongolia. He never visited China, Tibet, Thailand, or South America, or what I would call exotic locations.


The way my hypnotherapy worked was I brought in a list of questions, and it helped guide our session. I did ask about certain cultures I was drawn to, mainly Japan, American Indian and Roman. The Mongolian revelation came out of nowhere. I wanted to understand more about my brother, but had no inkling that it was one of his major lives. I think that is why in my regression I was blown away by the revelations about him, and it brought me much peace.
 
Wow. I never had a regression that detailed. Most probably as I'm doing it all wrong. My fault for not reading the instructions till the end. Now, I've even forgotten how to do it.


That's sounds like a really amazing memory. Seriously.
 
Horsedoc, Wow! Thanks for posting! Now I personally have been seriously thinking of undergoing


a past life regression really soon. This is all really interesting what you have posted.
 
Horsedoc...thank you so much for sharing your wonderful experience. The things you saw and the manner in which you felt and described them was incredible and tremendously detailed. Once again, I appreciate your taking the time to document such a deep and significant soul level experience...to me, this is nothing but corroboration of the fact we are souls having a series of human experiences.
 
WOW! Wish I could go to a regressionist >.>


You have some VERY detailed and interesting memories. The Mongolia memory is very interesting as was your one about the Vietnam War.


I was had a Vietnam PL, but the country I was from at the time has undocumented presence.


It was interesting to see not only how detailed they were, but how "real" they felt to you, almost to the point of it feeling like you're actually there. I've never had such detailed memories, and I want to thank you for sharing these with us.


Welcome to the forum and I can't wait to read what else you find out!
 
Hi Horsedoc,


There is a really good book called the Tao of Equus.


As a horse lover myself, (I use to show and train); I couldn't put this book down. It is an excellent read and very informative/resourceful. I am in the middle of finals week. Hope to be around more next week to read your posts.


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Thank you everyone. I was really not prepared for the emotions that rolled over me. I had not cried since my brother passed in 2008, and during my regression the incredible sadness I felt for my role in Vietnam, then seeing my friend dead, was just WOW. I can still feel the tears rolling down my cheek and my therapist wiping them away since my body was limp.


The other real interesting aspect was how I felt about my past cruelty. I have always had a strong connection, almost love affair with Roman history. I visited Rome almost 10 years ago, and I felt so much energy flowing through me while I was there, it was eerie. Well during my regression, I was horrified as to what a '*******' I was. I was sick to my stomach really. It was pretty insightful and I now look at the Roman empire in a totally different light.


BTW Deborah just ordered the book, looks like a great read. I love horses, they are incredible animals.
 
Thank you for sharing this with us! The one thing that turned me into a firm believer was the spontaneous and also strong reaction I had as well.
 
Indeed them :o


My brother was Gavin's best man for their wedding. So thought it ironic that if he came back as their son/daughter. The feeling I felt was he wasn't going to be 'famous' but rather 'celebrity parents' would be a catalyst and pathway to his philanthropy work that he didn't finish in his past lifetime. My brother was big on causes, and it came through in his photography and art.
 
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