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I think I was killed by a child molester in my past life?

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bashfulbat

New Member
Ever since I was a kid I used to have this nightmare that was always exactly the same. It would start with a kid standing in front of this old house that was being renovated by a bunch of men and as I would go to the front door they'd tell me not to go inside and to stay away but it was like I couldn't hear them and I'd always go in anyway. Most of the dream would be black or nothing as soon as I got in the house and then suddenly I found find myself at the end of this long hallway, a door a the end of it. There was always children screaming and crying behind it and I just remember feeling extremely terrified and like I needed to run. I had this dream for about 6 years and every time I would either just run in the opposite direction or I'd find myself closer to the door or reaching to open it. The very last time I had the dream I opened the door to find a man inside with a bunch of kids that seemed dead despite their crying and screaming, and I just remembering being so deathly afraid of him and thinking that he was the devil.

To add to that ever since I was a kid I've had this weird draw to pedophelia (not in a creepy pedo way) I've just always been curious about it in general, and as I kid (like kindergarten age) I had weird crushes on older men and always imagined myself in weird victim-offender type romances. Also I was deathly afraid of being molested as a kid even when I shouldn't have known about that kind of stuff or shouldn't have even been worried about it. One time I threw a fit in a doctor's office when I was young because the doctor wanted to check down there and my mom had a big talk with me after cause she thought someone was hurting me because of my reaction.

Does this seem plausible at all?
 
Hello and welcome :)


I'd say maybe. I've just learned that problems we have today for no apparent reason seem to be carried over from past lives. But, I can't tell if it for sure was a PL dream because in those dreams, we usually dream about ourselves being another person, or even a different race. I've had nightmares about concentration camps since I was little, so I think that I could have had a PL in WW II. But that's another story :)
 
I don't remember ever seeing her face, just seeing her from behind like I was following her. Not 100% sure if it was me in this life or another because of that. She had long gold hair that was straight, and as I kid I was a dirty blonde but my hair was chin length, shoulder at the longest and fairly wavy and curly. She was quite a bit older than me when I started having the dream though. Probably around 8 she was? (I'm so bad at ages) and I was around 3 or 4 I think because the dream is one of my earliest memories
 
It would be interesting if you could validate your memory. Do you remember anything specific about the house? Like the entrance for example? Or something else?
 
TheGagagirl1234 said:
It would be interesting if you could validate your memory. Do you remember anything specific about the house? Like the entrance for example? Or something else?
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It's clear in my head, but I'm not even really sure how if describe it. I'd know it for sure if I saw a picture tho. It's an older house, like a small mansion. I don't know what the inside looks like aside from tht one hallway, although I've had many different dreams that are unrelated aside from taking place inside this one, old house and I think the rooms in those dreams could belong to this house since they are they same style and age and such and I've never seen them before either. Those I could describe easily if I needed to. One of the rooms has always been my bedroom in the dreams, so it's very vivid for some reason.
 
bashfulbat said:
....I've just always been curious about it in general, and as I kid (like kindergarten age) I had weird crushes on older men and always imagined myself in weird victim-offender type romances. Also I was deathly afraid of being molested as a kid even when I shouldn't have known about that kind of stuff ...
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Hello bashfulbat,


this interest and these fantasies are typical for victims of sexual abuse. And yes, such things could have happened to you in a PL.


I had similar experiences and I know now about the PL connections.
 
Interesting how we often have these clues from what could have been a past life from "feelings" and instincts even though we have no actual proof/validation.


In my case, I have a "feeling" that i was a child killer in a past life or something. I get these weird flashes sometimes. I even feel "guilty" writing this post. It feels uncomfortable.


I absolutely do not want to have children in this life. The thought terrifies me and fills me with dread/guilt/fear.


Ironically, I worked at a maternity boutique and I worked as a preschool teacher for years in this life. Now, I run a daycare. What the hell!


Would you be open to regression?
 
Ok here's input from a past life criminal. In my memories I was no way a paedophile however I did commit crimes. So I'm on the opposite spectrum here. However, I have also talked to some of my past life victims and received their insight.


First. If you keep seeing this, I'd say there could be something to it. You have a clear place, sense of place and surrounding people. Seems too elaborate to be fabrication. It's highly probable that this man could be from a past life, and the memory of him still sends you into terror. If it isn't past life related, it could be reaching from your subconscious in this life - which I truly hope is not the case.


Your draw to paedophilia. Well, I've been drawn to the crimes associated with my past life. It doesn't mean you're a practitioner, but you still are drawn to it all needless to say. Your fear could be past life related also. Phobias can certainly transgress onto your current life from the past. I just truly hope as stated above your fears aren't hidden in your subconscious mind from current life trauma.


Does this all seem plausible? Yes. But I'd have to know more about it all to truly draw any conclusions.
 
Nangijala said:
Hello bashfulbat,
this interest and these fantasies are typical for victims of sexual abuse. And yes, such things could have happened to you in a PL. I had similar experiences and I know now about the PL connections.
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Many things are stored in the 'subconscious' as it is often described.... Many of us have past life traumas and confusions from things that happened 'before'. This, sadly, is often part of the 'human condition'.


The thing is how to make sense of this and how to work it into our lives in a constructive way, as much as possible. To me, that is the more interesting question.
 
bashfulbat said:
Does this seem plausible at all?
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Hi bashfulbat.


Welcome to the forum.


Yes, this seems very plausible. I hope you will enjoy it here and find this a good and safe place to talk about it all with people who understand (at least in part).
 
Hi Bashful Bat


The next time you have this dream try asking in your mind "Where am I ?" and "What is my name?" or try looking for a mirror if you can.


You could also try looking at the photos on the Missing and Exploited Children website and see if anything rings a bell.


I am sorry you have these memories, hopefully you will be able to solve the mystery and maybe bring closure for many families.
 
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