Hippy16's memories

[Hippy16]

In my last life, I think I may have died from drug use, alcohol use, or the effects of it. Then my life before that from my regression was about 1948-49 and I was in a hospital, I think it had something to do with my heart or lungs, I wasn't old maybe my late 30s.

This post and discussion is continued in the thread How did you die?

 

[Hippy16]

Slowly Unfolding

It takes me into a past life, and I am pulled to the mirror of myself as a woman. So it's blank, then there I am in the same hospital room again, and the nurse (the same one who stole from me in a previous regression) putting these bars on the sides of my bed. then she hits my arm, and I roll over, and it like repeats.

Then, this fatter nurse comes in, and sits at the end of my bed between the bars and the foot of the bed, and she lifts of my dress thing, and legs, and is wiping me. I feel very ashamed and sad, and I didn't like this memory at all.

Then I'm still in bed but at home staring at the wall. Then I walk downstairs and I have a dress on, and my hair is all fixed up real nice, and I'm cleaning the oven.

There are pots and pans piled between the oven and the wall, (the oven is also on legs?? and like the wall has a little corner, which the oven is placed in, if that makes any sense) but anyways all the pans fall and I feel stressed. Also the year is 1931, which flashes.

Then I see my mother waving, she is just like in the middle of nowhere, just she has an apron on and she's waving. then I see scenery, there's real green grass, and a huge black train. I have this black hat that tilts on my head kind of over my right eye, and I have gloves and a dress that goes down to the middle of my lower leg.

I am standing at the door, and look up, no clouds just a real blue sky. I mean really blue. and I feel so good about myself, and happy, like just a very content excited feeling, like I have my whole life ahead of me..Then I take my seat. (just now I had a small flashback of sitting in my seat and it's raining outside further down the trip, and I feel cold.) .

At the end I feel I was younger, in my late teens or very early 20s. I'm not sure what year it was, I would guess 20's, but I didnt get any actual flashes of a date.

 

[Hippy16]

My first memory from the 60's


...from my 60's life?


I kept having semi flashbacks, of this house, a boarding house, and the room. and there was a bed, and chairs, and people.


Then I had a vivid flashback of a young girl, about 16, in a red dress, and dark brown hair, kind of down but piled up a bit. Kneeling on the ground lighting a candle, with records all around.


The girl I saw was dressed in 60's style clothes, but not what I view as typical stereotypical 60's, you know bellbottoms, tie dye, so if it was just a daydream that's what I would have seen.


But I saw this mod type girl, I strongly sensed the year 1965. and I had a feeling of like I feel things are starting to change, and with the music, and just everything was changing. But I really dont know, I normally don't take my flashbacks as real, but I'm just not sure.


I also can't believe I would have been a woman again, but it does make sense I guess. I really wish my regressions would take me there.

 

[Hippy16]

I don't want the baby


Its was the early 1920's, I'm young, but married, probably 19-20. I know I didn't want the baby.


I'm alone, it's winter, or atleast cold. There are nurses, I don't remember a doctor. The room is so dark, not very hospital like. Kinda like an office. But i'm in the bed, and my hair is wet and in real life my stomach like flexes, uncontrolable. Like when you throw up. that kinda feeling.


I felt some pain down there.Not like how I would imagine childbirth, more like, a stretching feeling, and kinda sharp. But it wasn't that bad. (by the way I am a male in this life) so then the baby comes out in a rush, and the nurses put it in a metal pan and carry her off.


I just lay there alone and crying.


This post and discussion is continued in the thread PL childbirth memory

 

[Hippy16]

Regression, 1943.


So as usual I returned to the same house and kept seeing flashes of people. Then I walked into the house, and it was really vivid. So I walked into the kitchen, and it was especially vivid, almost lucid.


I saw a pattern on one of the dinnerware patterns I had out. then I walked into the living room, and saw this wooden thing by the door, and I had some plant on it, and some nick knacks, and the wallpaper on the wall with the stairs, came out very vivid as well.


So then I was looking through a suitcase I had set on the coffee table, and pulling different things out, and putting stuff in. I’m not sure I was just rifling through a suitcase, I don’t think it was mine. I think it was my husbands. So then I walk upstairs to my bedroom, and I also get vivid flashes in there as well.


Then im sitting at my vanity table over by the window, and for the first time in a while I see myself very clear in the mirror. Normally it’s kind of fuzzy. But I had blond hair, and had my hair kind of puffy but rolled. Then im putting mascara on, and getting ready.


I have this round hat on as well, and it has like a burlap texture. I feel like, I look pretty, but in the mirror I looked kind of over the top. With the lipstick, and lots of mascara, and long eyelashes, and makeup. I just had an odd feeling. And I have these dark brown leather heels on, and a white and brown dress, which really came out vividly as well. The date on the calendar is March 16th 1943, and I say that im 34 years old. The 16th was down in the corner in the spot of a Monday or Tuesday, and I checked it out, it was a Tuesday. Then im heading down the stairs, and this was the most real part.


I look down the stairs and see it, like im there. I don’t know why, but inside my house everything was becoming really lucid, and not like it usually is.


Side note, I got a flash of this card, or image, with this drawing of a little girl, reaching up at a boy whose up on top of something, like a fence, or a window, not sure. Then I saw this picture of a shaver with these leaves around it or something.


Then to my job, I had a feeling I didn’t have a job in 1943, so I was downtown, at this clock place, and there was other house decorations. The door to the place was blue glass with wooden lattice over it. Real tall doors. Then I leave, and go across the street, I say something about the name of the place but I forgot now.


Then I got to my childhood, and I say Ohio! So I grew up in Ohio! Which makes perfect sense. So anyways I am outside, oh yeah on my porch looking through this book. I think it was a diary, it was 1922-23 or so it said in the book.


It has tons of writings, and little pictures, but couldn’t make a thing out. Then I go inside, and I am by what looks like a wood burning stove. There’s lots of wood stacked against the wall. My mom is in the back sewing something. It tells me to ask for a message, and she says something about some guy will never be good enough, and wont amount to anything, haha. I think it was a message about that life, not for my current life. I found that amusing.


So then im down the hill and get this real scared feeling, and there’s this guy and he’s down there. (this is the second time something like this has happened, so im assuming I had some bad stuff happen to me) but I pulled away again, and tried to get away from that memory. I forgot some stuff too.


Then it says go to a bad memory. So then I’m suddenly in my house again, and I’m playing with my daughter, and she’s a baby! And in real life I’m smiling. And she has this knitted thing on, and I’m in my living room.


Then my Husband (Charles) slams open the door, and slams it shut, I pick up the baby to hold her. In real life I am actually emotional, and my eyes are tearing up, and I’m upset. And I keep seeing him slamming the door over and over, with so much anger. And I notice his hair is like hanging in his face. I’m assuming he was drunk.


Then he walks into the kitchen, and then rushes towards me and he’s yelling and pointing in my face. But he doesn’t hit me. All of this is also extremely realistic. Its just so weird how I can see the house from any angle, I don’t know, its something you have to experience to understand. So I pull away, and


I am still upset and my hearts still beating, and im out of breath. (also it asked me for a reason for the events, and something about the "adverse affects of my decisions" or something, i just remembered that)


So then to a happy memory, its kind of fuzzy, but I am at some parade, I am kinda happy, but I think it was just a random memory. I actually felt more annoyed for some reason. It was something to do with WWII, I am assuming soldiers were coming home. Then I just wake up, I had already come out of hypnosis from seeing the bad memory.


That was all.


-Brant


This post and discussion is continued in the thread Regression, 1943

 

[Hippy16]

Sunday, December 19th 1943


I went under fairly quickly, and fairly deep. I felt very far away. So anyways, as usual I return to the same house and walk inside. I walk in and I feel cold, I see our Christmas tree is up, in the corner of the living room by the window. I see cards hanging on the wall. And the same family portrait of me, my husband, and daughter as I saw in another regression. I peek in the kitchen. I feel very groggy. The house is dark, like its dusk outside, kinda blue gray, I look out the window its looks like it will snow. I got upstairs to my bedroom, and I am touching the wooden post on my bed, its round, and I notice how round the end is.


I see the calendar says December 19th 1943, Its Sunday! Look it up if you don’t believe me, but it really was a Sunday again!! How does this keep happening?? I mean this to me, means what I am seeing is real, because what are the chances of always seeing an actual date? Hm, I just looked at my last regression, and I also returned to 1943. I wonder why that year is significant?


So anyways I look in the mirror and my hair is different, I feel I got it done, for the holidays. Its real curly and round, not my typical style, and I don’t like it. I have black pointed high heels on, and I am putting on this khaki coat, and covering my head with a scarf. I then grab my bag and walk outside, and continue walking down the street, until it tells me to go to my job.


I am then at this building again, upstairs, there are a lot of desk with woman on typewriters, a lot of stuff scattered about. I see a man come out of an office, he is carrying a box of stuff, he has a white dress shirt and gray pants, he is balding and fat. I say something to him, and I’m talking to the other girls, I’m not sure what I was doing. I also noticed I was the head of something. I said, “ I’m the head of…” I was telling someone that. I felt really happy, and important at this point. I’m not sure what year it was, but I felt it was 1946 or 47 (this was at the end of my life) And I thought to myself, how did I let all of this go.


So then I return to my childhood in that life, it is 1924 and I say I look around 14. I am in the back room, and doing something with my hair. My mom is in her bed, and she is sick. It tells me to ask her for a message, and she says some random things. The says “You are your worst enemy, don’t let you get the best of you.” Then I leave. I see our flowers planted outside. I bump into someone by the road, and say sorry. I’m not sure who he was. Looked like a mailman, or something like that.


Then I go to a bad memory. So I am in the kitchen, and its 1934. I am on a rampage, I am throwing stuff around, and I break a beer bottle on the wall. My husband is trying to calm me down, but I am hitting him, and crying to him. Then I fall down into a chair and am crying and flailing about. (at this point I, meaning me, am watching this in horror, I couldn’t understand why I would be acting like this)


My daughter is real little, if its 1934, she is 4 years old. I go upto her and slap her really hard and start beating her around until my husband grabs me, and at this point I start crying in real life, I couldn’t believe I was beating my daughter. I know I was drunk, or on something, I just don’t know what was going on. And I am saying I will never do it again, and I keep repeating that. I then pull away from the memory. I just could not believe I would do that.


Then to a happy memory, I am little again, and I’m laying in the grass, and its warm, and its summer, and ahh it was just such a good memory to make me feel better. I just remembered, I then said I wanted to see Richard. So I am with him, and we are kissing, and hugging. It’s 1929. I am already married to Charles. Then Richard is carrying me inside his hotel room, I can picture the hotel room clearly. Then it ended. The people at the hotel were looking at us weird, It felt like they knew what was going on, but I didn’t care at the time.


This post and discussion is continued in the thread Sunday, December 19th 1943

 

[Hippy16]

A memory as a nun?


Last night i had a very interesting and weird experience that may or may not be past life related.


Last night before bed, i was washing my face, and just looking in the mirror. then i had a split second flash of myself, as a nun, and a older nun helping me put on my habit.


I can see the building. it was kind of open, i could see the grass outside, and we were kind of standing by these huge windows, except there was not glass, and it just led to the outside. Very strange.


I don't know if it was actually a flash memory of a past life or not. Also for some reason i felt the people were myself and my mom. I am not completely sure who was who, i just know it was us. I am more leaning towards myself as the older nun, and my mom the young nun.

 

[Hippy16]

Moreno Valley, 1983


The first thing i say is Moreno Valley California, and i see its in the southern part of California. (i will have to look up facts of Moreno valley, to see if anything comes up) so anyways i am in a suburb.


There are tons of houses, almost the same, but slightly different. There is a red car in my driveway with a tan leather top. it's smallish, and squarish. my house i can't describe, i will draw it. But i go inside and it reminds my of my house on ftknox. sorta.


Well there’s the living room, and i see the kitchen, and the window its real big. then i go back in the hallway, and go into the bedroom. It's my son’s room i say. There are bunk beds, and it is really messy. there are posters on the wall, i thought i saw the rolling stones, but i wasn’t sure. theres a desk, and its really messy. and theres just clothes everywhere, and its cramped. I see a calendar, and is march 1983.


i say I am 36, i think. (ok so i calculated and if i was 36, that means i was born 1947 (my last life i died in 47, and assumed i was reborn 1948, and theres no way i could have made that up, i can't do math in my head that quick..if at all) so then in the mirror...i am a woman again?


I have permed dark brown hair, almost black. I have a pointy kind of chin, idk, i just noticed my chin, and face. my eyes were the same. i had white tennis shoes, and jeans. and a flannel shirt, but not heavy flannel, light flannel, and i had the sleeves rolled up.( also by the house i saw woods, and a mountain sorta, more like idk, a small mountain. but just a huge subdivision, and i think a city off in the other direction)


so then i go to my work, and immediately see this little store. and outside there is like a display of flowers. and inside there are flowers everywhere, and i am behind the counter, with an apron on. there’s an old man there too. There are also potted flowers hanging from the ceiling. there are cars parked out front. i see a black man at the register and he is buying something from me, and i get a weird feeling.


Then it takes me to my childhood. and i see this brick house, and it's in the north somewhere, maybe Indiana, or Virginia, idk. so inside the living is really nice, and decorated. the table is like designed really cool, and theres a couch, and i see a tv, and oh yeah the left wall is entirely stone, and theres a fire place i think.


My mom comes out and she has a housedress on, and her hair is up. I get a weird feeling about her. she seems very distant, and not loving. My dad is nice (i have a dad!) and i sit on his lap and he calls me something, like, smucker or snucks, i dont know. but it was my nickname i guess. and i look at my mom and she looks sad, and not really there. its 1953, and i say i am 6. i have on a knee high dress, and my hair is short and curled under.


then i go to a bad memory. i see some randoms stuff. then i am on the street at night, and theres a tall wooden fence. then theres this man, a black man, and he hits me in the face, and I am crying and pull away from the memory. I'm not sure what happened, I don't really care to know. it was upsetting, and i was around the same age as in the beginning, 36 or so.


then to a happy time, I am sitting in school! and i see the blackboard, one in the front and one in the back. and i am high up, i look out the window. I am the only one in the class, then i walk into the hall way and see students walking to class.


I then see this boy and i am talking to him. and he says something. and he has his shirt tucked in, and is alot taller than me. I have my hair flipped, and a headband on my head, and my bangs are weird. i have a white dress and red thick belt. and white shoes. and im holding my books. I didn't get a date, but i looked about 15, so it would have been about 1962 or 63.


This post and discussion is continued in the thread Moreno Valley, 1983

 

[Hippy16]

1983, California


First thing I go back to my house in Moreno Valley. Its early morning, and I can see the mountain to the right, and the other houses. I get this really happy/sad feeling, and feel extremely happy to be there.


I walk in, and see some stuff, and notice there is a tv. I walk to the back bedroom, which is mine. The bed has a black comforter with silver design. It's a large bedroom. There is an ironing board up, and I large mirror. But the room is messy, and the bed is not made. There are clothes on the floor as well.


I leave the bedroom, and walk to my son's room, its messy as well. The date says Tuesday September 6th 1983. In the mirror I have the same dark brown/black perm. I have on black pants, no shoes, and a purple shirt idk. I looked weird.


Then to my job, I walk out of the house, and around back, and feel extremely happy. I was having such an intense feeling of happiness it was weird. It felt so familiar.


So I get in my car, and drive down the road, and its going kind of fast, then I merge onto the highway, and then end up at this place. Its not the florist, I don't think I worked there. Maybe someone I knew. But I walk in, then immediately go upstairs and there's a table, and shelves, and a small TV, and stuff everywhere, and a man. I'm not sure it was weird.


Then I go to my childhood. I also feel that same familiar happy sad feeling. There are huge trees around my house, evergreen trees. It feels cool, and its gray outside, but beautiful. I am older, maybe 15. I have shoulder length hair kind of in a flip. I have a knee length dress. I go inside and feel really sad. (For some reason this regression wasn't extremely clear visually, but extremely clear emotionally).


Something about my dad. Im not sure.


Then I see my mom in the kitchen, and it also is so familiar. She says "Don't let go" Then also she tells me "I am meant to heal old wounds". Both of those messages left me confused. So I walk into the hallway, and go upstairs, into a room, and I see a little boy or girl, or something, they were my sibling!! Then its telling me to leave.


The to a sad memory. I go back to the house, I am 15 or so. I get this extreme sad feeling, my entire body is tingly and terrified. My mom is there and she kind of holds me. I don't know what happened. I think my dad died.


Then I'm upstairs in the bathroom, and I'm crying and on the floor against the tub. Then I am in my room, looking in the mirror, like sideways looking at my stomach. I know I am pregnant. It is February 1964 or 65. I just feel sick about the whole situation. I am assuming I got pregnant around the same time my dad died, so it was not a good time in my life. I also got the feeling I never had the baby.


Then to a happy memory! It is 1970, I am in L.A. downtown, I can see it all. It is dusk, its warm, its beautiful. I am on the street with a man, and I have jeans on, my hair is long about to my mid back. I have a like button down yellow shirt, that's tight. I don't have shoes on. He is really tall, and has brown hair, shaggy. He has like a jean jacket on, and jeans. No shoes either. We kiss. Then We are in an apartment. 31 B to be exact. Its kind of a junky apartment building, but it feels so familiar.


Inside there are some people. The window is opened, and there's a table. And a couch. Someone is sleeping. Theres a lot of junk. I seem to remember newspapers in stacks, tied together everywhere. Some guy is on the floor by the window.


There were drugs or something being done. I felt weird. I kept seeing something. I don't know. It was hard to see anything. everything was distorted. Then I walked into the bathroom and slammed the door, it was dirty, and the mirror was dirty. I felt weird. Then it ended.


This post and discussion is continued in the thread Regression

 

[Hippy16]

Back to the 1970's


So first thing i say is Moralis? Muralis? I am not sure what exactly that meant. But I was at a very hotel looking place. It was a dark yellow/tan color with a tall fence around the pool area.


I walked into the pool area where the lobby was. Inside there was a desk, and big windows, and I saw a black man wearing one of those newsboy hats and a tan suit. The girl at the desk annoyed me.


I walked upstairs and down the hall and opened the door. I am assuming this was an apartment complex, but it reminded me of a hotel. Inside I saw this image of a girl or something with many many arms pulling knives out of her body, and she was all purple and pink and glowing. I shook it off and it went away.


The apartment was dirty, and it was the same apartment that I once regressed to in another regression. I looked out the window, and kind of leaned out.


Then I walked into the bedroom, there were 2 mattresses on the floor, and a man and woman having sex. I then was naked and started to join in. This was all very vivid, and weird. I started kissing the girl who was on top of the guy, her name was Jen I remember saying in my head.


Then I kind of just rolled off the mattress and was looking at the newspaper on the floor. (I have no idea why there are always newspapers everywhere, the last time I regressed to this apartment there were stacks of newspapers). The newspaper said Tuesday, September 19th 1972. and of course the date is real. I just looked it up. I am not even shocked by it anymore. How could every time I get a date in a regression it actually ends up being a real date? Well it would easily be possible if I am actually remembering true events, which I now know must be the case.


There was a picture of Nixon in the paper, im not sure something about a shooting or something too. Idk I was just looking at the picture.


So I then looked in the mirror, I was still naked and had dark hair down past my shoulders, and bangs cut right below my eyebrows. I was such a small woman, which I have noted in a lot of the regressions to this life. So I then put on a pair of jeans, and a white flowy shirt and walked out. I know it was Los Angeles where I lived at this time.


The it said to go to my job. Immediately I felt somewhat sad, but somewhat excited. It was a bar, or a nightclub. It was so cool looking inside. There was a stage with 3 strippers on it, but there were men and woman at the tables. It was packed. I was carrying a tray of drinks, and I had my hair kind of wavy, and a black low cut sleeveless button up shirt, black short shorts, and silver platform heels. There were neon lights, and palm trees inside. I said the name but I can't remember it now.


There were two parts to the club, that was set off by a platform between where the strippers were, and where other people were. But it was such a nice place, I really liked it. Then there was Georgette? But in my head her real name was John. She was a drag queen..She had on a purple dress and had big blonde hair and purple extreme eye makeup. We were friends. I talked to her for a bit then it was time to go. The year was 1972 or 73 as well.


Then it was time to go to my child hood. I was at my house and it must have been before 1964, because my dad died in 64 and he was still alive at this time.


My mom had her hair like puffy and curly bangs puffed up, then smoothed back, and then a puffy ponytail. It asked for me to get a message and my dad said "You have to let go, don't let the past hinder your present experience". Oh yeah before that I was kneeling down by the liquor cabinet, it was fairly big, and gold. On one side was just clear glass, and the other side was like gold lattice. On top was a shelf with an ice bucket and other stuff. I don't know why I remembered that so clearly. Also after talking to my dad I had a quick flash of his funeral. I was really close to my dad in that life.


The to an unhappy time in my life. So im a teenager, my dad has already died, and actually think it was fairly recent. Im on my bed crying, and my mom charges in and pulls me up from the bed, I am crying and screaming, she throws me into the bathroom and locks the door. I don't know why she did that, I felt so bad, I was crying on the floor. I don't know if this was when she found out I was pregnant or not, I felt that's what it was about.


I also released she would lock me in the bathroom a lot as punishment. So then I got up, went into the cabinet and pulled a bottle of pills out. In real life I start crying and feel extremely emotional. I take an handful of the pills and then lay back down on the floor.


Then it takes me to a happy time, and its 1967 I remember. I have a bathing suit on, and my hair is up. I'm on the beach with a very handsome guy, and he has on short swimming trunks. It's like evening; the sun is already set but its still light.


He picks me up and is running with me on the beach, then he falls on purpose and we start kissing. I just felt very happy at this time, and it was a nice memory. I can still smell the ocean, and hear it, and feel it. Ahh I really enjoyed that memory.


This post and discussion is continued in the thread My latest regression