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Are you afraid of death..?

Kristopher

Kristopher

Senior Registered
Even though you have a belief in life after? I'm possibly 90% convinced that we survive after death, so that 10% still makes dieing a scary thought to me.

I suppose it's only natural to fear such an event. It's not just death itself that's rather frightening to me, it's that there's so many horrible ways the "angel of death" can take us.:laugh:
 
Perhaps you could try reading Roger Woolger's "Healing Your Past Lives". It might just be the antidote to that 10% of doubt you have lingering on. I have just finished it and I recommend it: pleasant to read, elegantly written. I have found that over the past twenty years or so, reading widely about reincarnation, nde's, after-death communication, ghosts, clairvoyance and other human experiences and stories has bolstered my sense of myself as an immortal soul immensely. ;)
 
Not so much anymore (since I've become bitter and jaded over the past few years:() but I remember as a child of 6 I was in a cemetary and a thought hit me:


after this life, that's it...... forever!


What a terrifying thought for a happy go lucky child! This is probably the first step that ultimately ended up with me here. I had the same feelings come back from 18-20 and was petrified to do anything or talk to anyone. I'm still puzzled when just about everyone says young men have delusions of invincibility because I was the complete opposite of that.


Even with the knowledge I've gained it's hard to completely eliminate that fear. I know I was driven almost crazy about the idea that a God would send anyone to an eternal hell. Even though I knew the idea was completely absurd there is always that tiny bit of doubt. I've since learned to become a little more closed minded because being completely open minded 100% of the time can drive you crazy and not so nice people know how to take full advantage of it.
 
I don't feel fear for death...I feel fear for pain. To me, death is just the transition...and I would like that transition to come without feeling the effects causing that death.


I also have a strong belief we are spared that sense of being ripped limb from limb by large cats (in Rome), or flying through the air from the car and staving in our heads against a metal railing (in Newport, R.I.), or having our innards blown to outards by machine gun fire (in southern Italy). Each of those transitions were met solely with bodily pressure at the points of impact, but no agonizing realization of pain, although the image I got of the lion pulling off my arm included a look of agony on my face at the time, I felt only the pressure. Then immediately after the pressure came the unbelieveble sense of relief...absolute relief, love, happiness, and lightness.


If this is something we do time and again, why not make it so our ends, despite the views from the human side, are as easy, painless and smooth as possible?
 
Yes, for lots of reasons:


A) I could be completely wrong about what happens next. I don't think so, but there is a part of me that keeps its ballance by reminding myself that I could be completely imagining things.


B) Pain and fear really suck!


C) I am responsible for too many people right now to leave them here on their own.
 
Absolutely.


My main fear concerning death is leaving behind my child. Sure, there's a chance I could watch over him from the other side, but to me it's not the same. Leaving him on his own is one of the scariest things I can even consider.


As others have mentioned, beliefs about what happens next could be wrong ... and if so, that's scary to me. Yes, I can believe something, and evidence leans towards supporting that belief, however there is always the possibility of being wrong.


Pain is another consideration for me. I have a low pain threshold, and don't see not being afraid of 99.9% of ways of dying.


Then there is the unknown aspect. I am not good with facing new things blindly ... even in life, I have to ease in to things, if we're going to a new place, I research and plan, and at times, even do a 'trial run' with the route, etc. Yeah, I have issues :tongue: Again, I believe we live on (could be wrong though ... there's no 100% irrefutable proof beyond the shadow of a doubt .. for me at least) but even if we do ... not knowing the details concerns me.
 
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Blueheart and Knickknack, I see your points about leaving behind loved ones for whom you feel responsibility, and right now I would be devastated to leave behind my 18 and 12 year olds...it is a heartbreaking thought.


I also see it from the standpoint of our souls. From the time of our lifeplan, those with whom we intend to incarnate and in whatever capacity or role we intend to play for each other, we all have an understanding of the potential and possibility for shortened lifetimes, human tragedies and other events for which we came here to experience...some events more highly probable than others.


I take immense solace in the knowledge that those I love while incarnate are, on the other side, always with me, loved forever, and loved incredibly deeper than we can possibly imagine. This assuages my fear of death and enables me to deal with the incarnate loss...after all, its not the death which is traumatic, but rather the blinding pain of loss for the remainder of that life.


Along the same line, but sideways, I was told that we are spiritually responsible WITH our children, and while incarnate, we are only responsible FOR our children during their minority. It is our incarnate duty to give them the tools and skills to enable them to properly navigate this incarnate lifetime, and after that they have their own lifepaths to follow, just as we have. They may be inexperienced humans, but they are very experienced souls.
 
Yeah!


I think there's something after death, but am not completely convinced. So I worry about living, enjoying my life...then suddenly...nothing? And even if there is, I'll still have lost everying that I have now.
 
A little.


The pain part isn't a very jolly feeling, but as far as I'm concerned whatever happens after isn't much to worry about. If there is more to it all than just this, then great, but if everything really just goes dark and that's the end, so be it. What am I going to do? I won't have thought anymore and it's not like I'll be able to feel anything.


But then again, maybe there's something else besides those two alternatives... and that can be a scary thought.
 
I'm pretty old now so the fear that still lingers a little is not as strong as it was when I was younger. When I was 8 years old I had seen an accident in which a young girl was killed. I saw them carry her out of the car. From that day forward I would try to imagine what it felt like to be dead and not exist. It was impossible because not existing means nothing and trying to feel the nothingness was a trip. So all that contributed to my fear.
 
I don't think I'm afraid. I came close a few years ago and it was fascinating. I was aware of my heart not beating and sparkly lights converging to the middle of my vision, but thats as far as I got before my heart kicked on again. I believe 100% that we "survive life", I just hope that it doesn't hurt too much before I finally escape this body for the last time.
 
I don't want to die. I have too much to live for. I don't fear it beyond base survival instinct (as in I try to avoid it and have thus far been successful) because of my experiences with the dead and the dying, but for now I am having a great time at this party and don't want the dance to end.


However, once I get there, I will have no shortage of friends, and my recent ghostly experiences indicate to me that the dance never has to truly end.
 
I think it's perfectly natural for everyone to feel fear at the thought of death, even if it's considerably less with a belief in reincarnation. For most, the 'unknown' is a big factor...


For me personally, as others have said, my main fears with death would leaving behind loved ones. The moment just before death can be terrifying, but the moment just after death all fear and pain is gone. It's that moment before that people fear, not necessarily death itself...
 
I thought long and hard about how to answer this question. I knew what I wanted to say, just didn't know how to put it in words.


I've faced death twice in my life. When I was 4, the family was spending the weekend camping at the beach. Everyone was in the water - a relative was holding me in his arms. A huge wave suddenly swept over everyone and I was knocked out of his arms, nearly drowned but someone was able to grab onto me and pull me up out of the water. Another time in 2003, I fell unconscious in the bathroom. It happened very quickly (the doctors could find no cause/reason for why I suddenly lost consciousness and collapsed onto the floor).


I remember that it was at the very moment when things suddenly went wrong that the initial panic and fear hit me, and then a sense of calm until someone came to my rescue/aid.


Lady2 explained everything perfectly when she replied:

The moment just before death can be terrifying, but the moment just after death all fear and pain is gone. It's that moment before that people fear, not necessarily death itself...
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So, am I afraid? I think I'm more afraid of how it will happen - that initial moment when I know my life will cease. After that, I know I'll be in a truly wonderful place.
 
fear of death


..hardly at all , less than 15% and the older i get even that should reduce .


I do have some fear of a painful or drawn-out death .


It's all karma i suppose but we never can tell how much remains .


I'm sure the door out of life is also the door in to the next life .


What can be a hassle is the first few years having previously been wise and experienced and then having to learn to use a new body/country/family/language .)*(
 
Ignotus said:
To quote my uncle.. "Its not death I'm afraid off, its how I die I'm afraid off.."
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That is pretty much the way I feel. I have flirted with death a few times. Had a temperature of 107* when I was 5 days old, At 15 almost drowned, was going down for the 3rd time, no air left, I remember pushing off of my buddys head who had come back to help me then the 5th time and was gone when I felt the life guards hand jerking me under my chin and pulling me up to catch a breath of air and him towing me to shore at a swimming beach. He later told me he was sorry, he thought I was just messing around. Was in a severe auto accident when I was 20, two of my friends were killed. I was thrown out of the car as it flipped and slid 130 odd feet in the middle of the road. I had layed there for a while until a passer by spotted me and told the paramedics, they thought I was dead. On the way to the hospital I was shocked back to life with the paddles twice and finally given last rites. My head was cut ear to ear and my left eye was out. Lost a bunch of blood but didn't even need a transfusion. Was in the Emergency ward for one week going in and out of conciousness (or so I was told). The doctor later said it was truly a miracle I survived and marvelled at the fact I didn't even need a blood transfusion. The next thing I remembered was seeing the overhead lights in the hallway as I was being wheeled up to a regular room. Before the accident I remember looking at the clock on the wall 12:27 pm. My memory from one whole week was lost forever. Had been in a wreck the year before, to the day Dec 20, 1968 and 1969, even wearing the same coat. Thrown through the windshield and landed a field. In this one if I had had my seat belt buckled I would have been killed, as the roof was smashed down to the seat of a '66 Mustang.


I really don't fear death at all except losing my loved ones and my cat, but that may be a thread coming in the future;).
 
Would you fear death with the knowledge that on the other side, death would have the same emotional charge as the passing of a sunset, with the new dawn being a new lifetime?


Would you still fear death if you knew your loved ones were with you forever...you would always be with them no matter where you were, and only while incarnate would you have the illusion of being alone, with the possibility of growing to realize how close they actually are?
 
Would you still fear death if you knew your loved ones were with you forever...you would always be with them no matter where you were, and only while incarnate would you have the illusion of being alone, with the possibility of growing to realize how close they actually are?
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Now I know I'm supposed to say 'no' to this, but honestly, if you knew my loved ones you'd prefer being gnawed by demons with sharp teeth for all eternity. I loved them, but there is relief that I don't have to deal with their constant neediness and drama. Would I do anything to see them again? Yes. Would I want to be stuck in close proximity with them forever? Does 'aaaarrrrgggh!' answer your question? By the by, I suspect they may feel the same way about me. :laugh:


I used to smoke heavily and take too many pain-killers. Then I stopped both, many years ago, with no problem. Then some 'loved ones' who were in my life then have recently reentered. I now have an over-whelming urge to smoke, and I've started taking more pain-killers. I now realize that I'd quit when they were out of my life. Coincidence? I think not.
 
OT- Sister Grey- Your post reminded me of something I read a few years ago about the concept of one's "people". Much is said along the lines of "These are my people...". In a book on Norse (I think) beliefs, etc., the author stated that the definition of one's "people" is not necessarily family or even fellow countrymen but is instead those people who love and accept you and whom you, in return, love and accept. You might have family that you can't stand, or that you can stand only for a while or at a distance. They are your family, but are not necessarily your "people". Your people are those who do your spirit good.


Sorry for the brief threadjack. It just reminded me of that philosophy.
 
For sure, my people don't necessarily have to be those related to me but I've never found many people I'm completely at ease with in any case.


('My people' does sound nice, though, sort of Boromir-ish - Boromir: I ask only for the strength to defend my people...the world of men will fall, and all will come to darkness, my city to ruin. Aragorn: I do not know what strength is in my blood, but I swear to you I will not let the White City fall, nor our people fail.") (Although I'm fairly sure that if I was one of Boromir's people I'd be stuck trying to keep him from stealing things that don't belong to him, and generally trying to keep all hell from breaking lose and everybody else from throwing themselves off the parapets or getting drunk at the first sign of an orc, all while doing all the dishes. :D )
 
LOL! I found early on that I didn't feel completely at ease with much of my family, extended or otherwise. Even old family friends, the Salazars, the Arrendondos, etc. all felt like strangers to me. I haven't seen these people in years, and if death should separate us, I doubt either of us would take much notice. I have some friends and acquaintances whom I would miss a bit. But "my people", which consists right now of my husband and his brother's family? I would miss them dearly! I would struggle to remain an earth-bound spirit to watch over them all and help them!
 
Ignotus said:
To quote my uncle.. "Its not death I'm afraid off, its how I die I'm afraid off.."
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I'll second that thought.


I'm not scared at all of "After" Death....I'll be Free and Home At Last. No more worries, no more problems, no more pain, no more fear and no more of being in a Society that "gets up to all sorts of misguided or evil shenanigans" - bliss:D:angel:


My fears centre round the dying process though. In my Society currently I do believe this is made unduly prolonged and unnecessarily painful - because a lot of the people and the medical profession by and large don't seem able to accept "when the Time has come".


I feel easier in my mind knowing that I think there is a good chance before my Time has Come that it will be possible for anyone "of sound mind" to go to their doctor and say "I have an illness that can't be cured - I've tried, but it won't go - so now I am going. I refuse to live with this illness - so can you help me to Go Home please" and the doctor will do so without any problem/without any trip to Switzerland being necessary. I estimate this will come in my Society in about 10-15 years time - so hopefully in time for me not to have to do a DIY "trip home" if ever I get a serious illness without having to fight for my right to decide "enough is enough" if life becomes unliveable ever.


I DO fear being made to try and live on with an illness that Society cant/or won't cure. I do fear the possibility of having to do a DIY "trip home" if I ever get such an illness (in case I "muck up").


Take away the fear of being made to "hang around on Earth in worse health than I would accept personally" or in a Society that had "gone back to the Dark Ages" - and you would instantly take away my fear of dying. There is no need for fear imo if one knew the option was there to go instantly from "too ill to have a life worth living in one's opinion" (or being made to struggle to live - ie if a normal easy Western late 20th Century lifestyle became impossible for us to sustain) to dead and Safe in a matter of hours if one decided to do so.


************************


There's no way of curing all the fears and worries about living though - risk of illness/other people injuring oneself/risk of the Government slashing the value of my income/Society continuing to get more and more overcrowded or some **** b***** getting us into a Major War or even the risks attendant on living in a Society that has been involved in constant Off-Shore Wars for some years now (and thus bringing the risk of terrorism down onto our heads as retribution for this).
 
Dad was back 5 1/2 hours after dying of cancer. He was laughing and making jokes to family members. I know he is in an amazing place and he is very happy there.


I have no fears other than leaving my child behind with no one to care for her.
 
Used to be afraid.


I have had about five friends and family members die within the last couple of years. My fears of death centers around the pain they felt going through the dieing process. I know that they will always be around but having to deal with their physical absence is the hardest. I know that they are in a much better place. But it still hurts to be without them. I would hate to leave my children alone without me. I know they would have to go on, They are still too young to be without me .


I think my only fear of dieing myself centers around loosing my ego. My personal identity and my physical attachments to this body and my family. I can never be this person again. There is some sadness around that. From my own experience I know that souls meet again and again in different roles. but I kinda like the combination of souls I have right now. That is hard to give up. Actually dieing, no no fears now.
 
Fear of Death


It isn't so much a fear of dying, it is more a fear of dying before I finish my "task", and leaving loved ones behind who may still need me.


After watching my mom die from cancer I realized that most people die when they are done with whatever plans or (lessons) they have made for their lives. However, I believe that some die before they are finished due to an accident or something of that nature, and these people may leave with a sense of regret for not completing their task, and may worry about loved ones they left behind.


It seems like the ones who fear death the most are probably the ones who still have a lot to do yet.
 
I'm different in that I'm very little bothered by how I die, just by the whole being dead thing. :laugh: Almost all the people I know who died didn't really seem to suffer that much; some were in gruesome accidents that sounded terrible but for them it was over quickly. For the old or ill there were a few exceptions, but almost everyone wanted to keep on living for as long as they could, and I'm sure I'd want to, too.


But for me I am bothered by the idea that even if there is an existence after death I will have lost everything, that is, the complete persona that I now am, and of which I am quite fond.
 
Re the thought of losing ones complete "persona" on death - I don't think of it that way.


I expect to still be "me" (ie Cariad) for however long I decide to be (that'll be the rest of Eternity then:laugh:). From my (large and assorted reading) on this matter - I expect that I will be exactly the same after death as before death. The only difference being I don't need a body any more and it will be my choice as to whether to just be in "speck of light" type form or to look recognisably like myself (ie Cariad) - only my best-looking version with all defects removed (that'll be me looking about 30 then:D).


From what I've read - I expect to be able to continue as the Cariad I know from there on in and it would only be by my own conscious/deliberate decision that I ever "amalgamated" into the communal Group Soul/Universe/whatever-it-is that one can choose (if one wishes) to go into at the level of the very highest "Astral Planes".


To me - why would I want to lose track of Cariad and forget about my own identity? It's not to my taste - I would find the thought abhorrent actually - so I will stay as Cariad end of....


The only difference to me (as opposed to not having a "physical" body any more) will be that I will have full memory of all the other lives/bodies that I've had prior to my 20th/21st Century Final Life (ie this one).


Other people may think differently as to what they would do in those "Now on highest Astral Plane - and could 'lose my identity' into a communal thing if I want" and thats entirely up to them. For myself - I've had to fight pretty long and hard to "be my own person" in this life and spent some years living a lifestyle that was a bit "ahead of my time" before Society changed and "caught up". I've fought for my right to be me (eg remaining single - rather than "settling" by marrying the best available person) and making the deliberate choice to be childless. Back when I was in that agegroup - non-career woman didnt make a deliberate choice to remain single if they didnt meet the right man for them. Back when I was in that agegroup (and still to quite a large extent) people didnt sit down and make a deliberate decision as to whether to be a parent ever - and then decide not to. There are other ways I am still "ahead of my times" in some ways - as the future majority position on many issues is still a minority one at present (and the one that I personally hold) - so I'm still having to "hold firm" to a way of thinking that is still of The Future (rather than The Present) in some ways and I'm proud of myself for finding the strength to do so iyswim.


Why give up a "Me" I've had to fight for? Hence - I won't be doing that. So - personally - I have no fears of "losing myself" after death - because I know that won't happen to me.
 
It is my impression we don't "give up" ourselves when we transition to spirit except our material body...but I don't think there is a choice involved. To me what occurs is we once more see the greater picture without blinders and are able to understand our larger soul and all its past experiences and individual lives which enables us to put this most recent life in perspective. None of it is lost and all of it is brought into the whole soul.


Further, it seems to me that our incarnate wants and desires will also be expanded and we will be able to more clearly see our soul's greater intent, thus our portion of soul contribution towards advancement.


I don't know why guidance is sending it, but I am reminded of the guy recovering from an NDE who said "Over there I was fricken' Albert Einstein, then I come back here and I'm the same old moron I was before!"
 
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